Charlie Swan: Vampire Hunter

26

For the next few weeks I stay at Carlisle's house. He put in his bed and I only leave to go to the bathroom. When Renée shows up, Carlisle talks to her and gets her a room at the only hotel in Forks. The two of them make plans for what happens next- her funeral and such things. I stay in bed. The world feels too big, too cruel to go out into. I know Carlisle is worried. I can see it in his face every time he comes to check on me, but I can't bring myself to move. It's like the grief is a crushing weight on my chest. I can't breathe let alone do anything. 

"Charlie." Carlisle enters the room with a tray of scrambled eggs and pancakes. I roll over and ignore him. "Come on. You have to eat something, the funeral is this afternoon. You are not going to miss it, and you are not going to pass out because you haven't eaten anything in three days." 

I let him help me into a sitting position but make no move for the food. Carlisle sits on the bed in front of me. I can see the concern in his eyes, but can't bring myself to care. "I'll feed it to you if you want, force feed it to you if I must. But one way or another you are eating this food." 

"No I-" My voice is rusty from disuse and I have to clear my throat. "No. I'm not eating that. And I'm not going." 

"Charlie. You have to go." I can see the pity in his eyes and he puts his hands on my shoulders and leans in. "She was your daughter. If you don't go to her funeral you will regret it for the rest of your life. I couldn't let you live with that kind of regret if I could help it. And I can." 

I shake my head vehemently. "I can't show my face at her funeral when I did this to her. I let her go out. I was the adult, I should have known it was a bad idea. I didn't even know where she way going I just said 'have fun' and she left and then Jacob was there saying she was hurt." Somewhere in the middle I start crying again and Carlisle has pulled me into a hug and is holding me close to his chest. "I just wish there was something I could have done to save her." 

I sit bolt upright and shrug his arms off me. I stare at his surprised face. "You could have turned her couldn't you? When she was like almost dead but not quite. You could have saved her and you didn't. WHY DIDN'T YOU SAVE HER?" I lash out at his face punching and scratching until he grabs my wrists. 

"Charlie calm down! I would never have turned her because this is no life for her. She didn't even know about vampires and couldn't give me consent to turn her. Without consent I-"

"I would have given you consent to save my daughter's life!" 

"You don't understand. This is not a life you want to live unprepared and unwanted. It's not easy.  It may look easy but it's not. Constantly fighting the urge to kill every human in sight. Not breathing too deep lest you catch a whiff of someone's blood and lose control. Only hunting and night and sating your hunger on animals but never really being full. It's not a life I would ask you to lead and it's not a life I would have asked her to lead." 

I have no response for this and let him feed me half a pancake and a couple bites of eggs. Then he dresses me and we go to the cemetery. 

Per usual, it's drizzling. The rain hasn't stopped since Bella's accident. I let Carlisle lead me around. Not talking to anyone, just staring at the ground and only nodding when people offer me their condolences. Renée is sniffling over the grave and I can't blamer her, but I'm numb to it all until Carlisle presses my sword into my hand and whispers in my ear. "Be ready. Edward just told me that there's a coven that's been circling forks for days. Apparently they chose now to converge on the cemetery, probably drawn in by all the people."

This finally breaks through my stupor. I leave the sword unlit and hanging at my side, but start moving through the crowd with a purpose, my head on a swivel. Carlisle moves away from me, blending into the crowd and I see the rest of the Cullens on high alert throughout. I catch a glimpse of movement in the trees and then all hell breaks loose.