After Before and After

Phase 4: Chapter 10

The last week and half before the trial felt like a trial of its own. At least, that's how Ralph Langley saw it. He and Jack still talked everyday on the phone, but there was still an unspoken tension between the two following the night Jack pushed Ralph into the kitchen counter. Ralph was also in communication with Sam and Eric quite a bit over the course of the month of November. The twins too were spending what felt like every waking hour worrying about and preparing for the approaching date that was looming at the front of not only the boys' minds, but the minds of most who kept up with the news in Georgia. Anticipation even spread across the country in smaller degrees as the upcoming trial continued to make headlines as the big day approached.

An inevitable consequence of how much time and energy the trial was demanding was Ralph's absence from school. Surely, he wasn't the only boy missing school to review evidence, meet with lawyers, and get everything ready for the trial. Ralph knew that Jack and the twins were missing a lot of school too. In Ralph's opinion, it seemed rather stupid. They already missed so much school because of the island itself. The trial seemed to be counterproductive to his already-suffering education. Ralph didn't miss much school at all in September of '92. But once the Langleys got the ball rolling on mounting his defense, the preparation took over his life. He was missing two or three days a week throughout most of October. By mid-November, the school wasn't expecting Ralph to show more than one day a week. And some weeks, he didn't show at all.

The other boys' schedules were very similar, and if the trial took an excessively long time (which Zoey told the Langleys they should be prepared for), they may again be at risk of not passing their current semesters or even grades. But Ralph knew that none of that would matter until this was all put to rest. A whole two years after the island, Ralph was beyond ready for that to finally happen.

The trial date was set for Monday, December 7th 1992. Although, this would be the first day, it certainly wouldn't be the last. The trial could span weeks, or even several months. Ralph felt like all the preparation in the world wouldn't be enough to prepare him for the emotional toll it would take on him. It would be draining, spending hours during the day in the courtroom. Ralph was questioning his own long-term competence to stand trial. He wondered if any of his former squad members were feeling the same way.

Everyday in the six days of December drained all the energy out of Ralph. He spent most of the day meeting with Zoey (with or without either or both of his parents, also with or without Jeremy Reynolds, the case's primary defense attorney), on the phone with Zoey or Reynolds, or on with Jack or the twins. When he wasn't doing any of those things, he was talking with his parents about the trial. And even when he wasn't doing that, he was holding back tears as he tried to cram a weeks worth of school work into a couple measly hours late at night. Of course, he didn't understand much of it given that he was hardly ever in attendance anymore. But Ralph felt like the island had ripped enough of his education away from him. He wasn't about to let it take away his freshman year, too.

Every night Ralph's head hit the pillow, he was out in a matter of minutes. It always felt like he'd slept maybe fifteen minutes when his alarm went off the next morning. Despite the fact that he usually slept through the night no matter how late he went to bed, he never felt refreshed. The trial took over his life, and somehow it also managed to take over his mind. He went to sleep thinking about it, dreamed about it, and woke up thinking about it. Ralph couldn't have stopped thinking about it if his life depended on it. The thing was he felt like his life really did depend on the trial. How ever is one supposed to sleep with that weighing on their mind?

Ralph knew he never would've even made it to this point if his parents hadn't been here to support him. He constantly thought about Jack not having that support, and it broken him up inside. Usually, Jack would just come to Ralph and his family for the support he lacked at home, but trial preparations kept Jack in Dalton all the time, especially toward the end of November and into early December too. Ralph would've been more worried about his own fate if his mom was worried, but she didn't seem to be. Ralph continued to insist even in private that he had no part in killing Simon, and his parents believed him. Zoey told them that she believed him too. Ralph was good at heart, and Zoey was certain that a perceptive jury would be able to see that just by looking and listening to him.

Both the Langley parents knew their son's innocence wasn't a tough sell, but they also knew that Jack had a harder battle to fight in the courtroom. Even if the verbal testimony of the boys didn't make Jack look bad, his own delinquent history would. Jeffery didn't have the heart to worry Ralph with that thought, but deep down he knew that Ralph was already thinking it.

Jack and Ralph stayed close and connected in the last few days leading up to the trial. Despite the fact that Ralph was overtired all the time and Jack was hot-tempered all the time, they still called each other everyday and said 'I love you' everytime before they hung up. Jack could hear the exhaustion in Ralph's voice, and he hoped that Ralph couldn't hear the hesitation in his own. And if Ralph wasn't so consumed by the what if's of the trial, he might've payed more attention to the distance Jack was putting between them. If it hadn't been nearly ten days since they last saw each other, he might've looked into Jack's hollow eyes and saw just how far he was drifting.

The trial was eating Ralph up inside, and everyone around him could see it. His parents knew only one way to take his troubles away, and that was the impossible task of making the trial disappear. But there was no way around it, only through it. Ralph didn't stay up at night worrying about his own fate. All the time, money, and effort put into his defense was enough of an insurance policy on his own life. But there wasn't a defense money could buy to guarantee Jack's innocence. No matter what the verdict on his own guilt came out be, Ralph knew he wouldn't be free unless Jack was free too.