Back Talking & BackHanding

Bad Choices

Ari POV

My head hurt but not from being slammed into a wall by a guy with just about twice as much meat and muscle as me. It hurt, because of all the thoughts that swarmed into my mind as soon as Sean finished what he was saying. He didn't do anything wrong, hm? I think he did a lot of things wrong but I wouldn't tell him to his face. He knows what he did wrong but I had done worse. I felt stupid. I felt dumb. I felt like an idiot. He'd hurt me. He'd left me outside and tried to starve me to death. He'd beat me. And I let him do it. And I let him touch me again. I let him hold me. I felt like the biggest dummy in the world.

Why did I feel like I needed him and why did I want him so bad if he'd done me so wrong? I didn't know. But I did know that I needed to stay away from him. He was only going to break me. Physically, mentally, emotionally, socially. In the end of all of it I was going to be broken unless I kept myself away from the breaker. And the breaker was Sean.

You can't stay away from him...you know you can't do that...My mind said to me. But he hurt you, the only thing to do is keep your distance. My other side said. I didn't know who to listen to. It was like the angel and the devil. And neither was giving me a very good reason to do either. After a while, I turned over on my side and noticed Sean had left the room. I was sure he went to get dressed and stuff. What would he do when he came back? Would he hurt me? Would he apologize? Would he try to talk to me at all? Would he ignore me?

I didn't know but I didn't want to know, either. I stood up and threw on a jacket and shoes. Creeping into the living room and sneaking out of the door. I made sure to close it as quietly as I could. I backed away from the house and then walked off to the beach. The beach was a while away from the house but it was okay. I didn't know what the beach was going to do for me. If Sean had the heart to come look for me, he'd know that would be the first place to check.

And so, I couldn't stay too long. But the beach gave me this feeling of safety that I liked a lot. When I reached it, I took off my socks and shoes and walk along the sand for a while. The warm ground feels nice of my feet and the sun was giving me good heat. I listened to the water swish and sway and watched the white tips of the waves. The view was beautiful. It reminded me of the beach back in San Diego. I missed home. I'd tried to call but there was no cell service.

I wanted to go home. I wanted to be back with my friends and family and away from Sean and all of this madness. I didn't know how long it would take anyone to notice the students were missing but I hoped it would be soon. I wanted to go home to my mom. To my dad. To my sister. To my best friend. I wanted this all to be over. I wished I had never gotten on that damn plane and this wouldn't have happened.

But what would have happened to Sean? He'd be all alone. No, that's what he deserved. Right? I didn't know. I walked off the beach and placed my socks and shoes back on. I walked along the trail Sean had made and just looked around at the flowers and trees and nature. It was gorgeous. I always loved the outdoors. My sister and I had always went camping and hiking and stuff like that. Good Times. Did she miss me? I missed her and my parents like crazy.

I wondered off the trail for a second and went deep into the woods. There wasn't much to see. Just sticks and rocks and some squirrels here and there. I was looking around for poison Ivy. I was not trying to get any rashes out there without some type of cream. As I went deeper into the forest, I heard footsteps. Footsteps. That was never good in the movies. I did my best to stay calm as I did my best to quickly find my way back to the path.

The footsteps became louder. I picked up the pace but I saw no sign of the trail I was once on. The footsteps became louder and faster. Frightened and lost, my heartbeat picked up and I started to get worried. I felt myself being pulled backwards by my hair and I let out a loud scream because it hurt so much. I flailed my arms around, hitting the hands that were fixed on my head.

"Let me go!" I cried. "Shut it, Fox." Sean's voice growled although, he loosened his grip a lot. Not enough for me to get away but enough so the pain relaxed. "Get off of me!" I barked. Sean ignored me and latched his hand to my wrist, releasing my hair. "Let-" Sean shoved me into a tree to shut me up. It didn't hurt at all, he didn't push me that hard, but it scared me.

He pressed his body against mine and gave me this deep and angry stare straight into my eyes. I gulped. "We're going home." He said. "And you're not going to say another word until we get there. Hear Me?" I didn't answer at first. I looked at the ground. "Look at me." For some reason, whenever Sean told me to look at him it gave me this weak feeling.

I felt like he was in charge of me. And I was supposed to do what he said...and I wanted to. Lifting my head, my eyes met his. "Hear Me?" He repeated more sternly. I nodded. "Say it out loud."

"I hear you."