who am i to you?

21.1

Change is a process and it starts with the thought and the plan to do it. I had those two. But my attempt to change was a failure because from the start, I'm planning my failure.

I didn't change because my heart wasn't with that decision. I wasn't really intending to do it at all.

So where am I now? Who am I now?

I'm still the same Vasily Jiang Vagankov who's in love with a boy, in love with Saint Laurent Seong.

Continuing on the summer vacation before our last year in senior high school, since we're free to do however we want (though not much for me), Saint decided to go out somewhere. Again.

I woke up to my phone ringing beside my bed. I've deleted all my alarms so this just means that someone is calling. With my eyes still shut, I reached for my phone and answered the call.

"Hello?" I asked in a groggy voice.

["Did you just wake up?"]

Hearing that voice, my lips first reaction is to smile. Of course, who wouldn't be smiling when the person you really love called first thing right when you woke up?

"Yes, Saint. Bakasyon ngayon so I'm free to sleep in late," I said.

["Late. Hindi super late. Look at the time."]

I'm still sleepy so I struggled to open my eyes. Instead of moving around to face the side of my bed where my digital clock is, I just distanced my phone from my ear and checked the time there because that required the least amount of movements.

Now I get why he's scolding me like a mother. It's already one in the afternoon.

I put my phone back beside my ear. "Sorry. I enjoyed that sleep way too much."

["I can see that very well."] He chuckled, his tone now isn't scolding anymore. ["Good afternoon, Vy."]

I laughed. The sudden change in his tone is scary sometimes. "Good afternoon, Saint," I greeted him back. "Why did you call?"

["I called to tell you to get on your bike. Let's go out."]

"We just went out yesterday."

["And?"]

"Aalis uli tayo ngayon?"

["Yeah, why not?"] he said nonchalantly. ["Bawal ba?"]

My chest relaxed, a sigh making its way out of my lips. "Hindi naman."

["Okay, so let's go. Bumangon ka na bago pa kita maabutan d'yan at ako pa ang maghilamos sa'yo."]