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I have been doing everything, I don't know what to do with the information I know, the news I got not only affected me but it will with my brother

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I have been doing everything, I don't know what to do with the information I know, the news I got not only affected me but it will with my brother.

I stare as he eats breakfast for dinner talking it up with Zayn. He looked contemptuous of life as if all his ducks were slowly lining up.

I didn't want to take that away from him, he didn't deserve my selfishness. He didn't ask for a brother that sometimes just couldn't care about the small things.

But I did for him, I cared about his football games, his girlfriends. His drunk college roommate. His loneliness and his reason to be okay and that was me and Zayn.

You can look at a person and think they are strong but deep down they are fragile to their memory. So was I...I became a prisoner in my mind.

"I gotta get going, I'm taking Summer on a date," I said as they shot me a nod going back to their conversation.

I walked out of my house picking a random car to drive from my car collection, she was going to love the gift I got her.

I speeded pulling up to her house as I knocked on the door.

She answered the door as I drank in her beauty. She wore black Givenchy black leather boots as she paired them with black tight leather pants and a light brown fur coat that stopped right at her hips.

She reached her hands and check my temperature, pulling out a thermostat. "See I'm all good and all cure," I pull the thermostat away from her hand.

Holding her hand I placed a warm kiss on the back of her palms as I walked us into the house and placed the thermostat on the small island.

"You look beautiful," I complimented as she covered her hand in her face.

I placed my hands over them to pull them away as she shyly looks up. "Really?" She asked nervously pouts looking adorable.

"Yeah really," I nodded to myself as I was reminded of how fucking good this woman looked. Fuck she looked expansive, she looked like she own a mob.

"Well thanks, daddy," she giggled as I sighed.

"I'm not a father."

"I know that, but you look so handsome and you look like you're doing way better," she smiled, giving me a pack.

"You think so?" I genuinely asked. Truth be told I was sinking and I don't know how much longer I can hold onto this world.

"Yes, handsome," she smiled genuinely, causing me to smile at her. She couldn't stop smiling. I never thought in a million years that I, Kazimir would be responsible for her smile.

She applied more lipgloss in the car ride, as I tried to pay attention my mind kept pulling me away from her. I thought my mind tricks at a young age to keep myself at a distance from the past.

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