Jake pov:
OMGSHHHHHSHAHSHHA Y/ N FAINTED!!!!!!😭😭😭 AGGAGAGAGAGGAFAFAFSGGSFAHRYWGVDHAVSHDHEGSHEYSGYSYSYSGSHSYSG!!!!! Well I guess I should do something lol
I pick Y/N up bridal style her bazoongas rubbing my chest. I sprint home faster then my dog when he saw a chance to escape.
Once I get home I see my father out the front door, "Junior I've been waiting for you, Shrek and Dora broke into our house and ate the cat- WAIT WHY ARE YOU CARRYING A GIRL!!! WHY IS SHE BLEEDING!!????!? IS IT THAT TIME OF MON-" I cut my dad off by politely saying "OH F•CK OFF!!! YOUR A GINGER NOTHING YOU SAY MATTERS!!!!! YOU HAVE NO B!TCHES BC YOU ASK TO MUCH AND LOOK SO OLD THAT I CANT TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN YOUR FACE AND A C*CK!! YOUR LIKE 82!!!! I WOULDN'T BE SHOCKED IF YOU SNEEZED AND THAT SHATTERED YOU WEAK, CRIPPLED BONES!!!! MOM WAS LIKE 2 WHEN SHE STARTED DATING YOU!!!! AND YOU HAD TO OF BEEN 80 BACK THEN SINCE MOM IS 4 NOW!!!!!!!! PEDOPHILE!!!!! NOW GO AWAYYYYYY AHAHDHSHSHHDHSHHAHDHAHSHSHSHHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHDHHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHAGAGAGAGAGGGAAAAAGAHAJAJAJAJAHSHAHJAJUAHSHAIAJANSJHSAJAJHA!!!!!!" I run past my dad making sure to piss on him in the process.
Sorry about how short this chapter is lol
YOU ARE READING
The Life of JakeyPooAlpha69 •it's satire I swear•
HumorJake just isn't like the other boys... he's an alpha wolf OWWUUUUHHHHHHHHHH Inspired by a y/n book I can't remember the title of this is rated mature because of swearing and sexual stuff... no detailed sexual stuff though Istg this is satire!
