Jakeypooalpha69 pov:
I've been in choir for about 3 minutes and I feel like my ears will fall off. The choir sounds so awful, they sound like dying peacocks chocking on their blood whilst drowning and burning at the same time and developing stage 2 thymoma; but my singing sounds amazing, obviously. Their voices are so scratchy and disgusting UGH. I cannot stand to be in here any longer so I politely ask,
"OI! Stupid teacher guy! LET ME GO TO THE BATHROOM OR I WILL END YOUR BLOODLINE!!!!"
"NO! NO ONE WILL LEAVE MY CLASS BECAUSE IM IN AAGOOOOONYYYYYYYY!!!!" The stupid, annoying, goofy teacher who says agony any chance he has, yelled.
"No," I say ignoring what the teacher just said and begin to walk out of the classroom, "Oh and by the way, Cinderella will never fuck you!!!! YOU SHOULD JUST GIVE UP AND DIE AND BLOW YOURSELF AWAY OFF A CLIFF!!!!"
The teacher guy stares at me absolutely shocked before screeching, "AAAAGGGGGGOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNYYY CAN CUT LIKE A KNIFE,
I MUST HAVE HER TO WIFE-"
"STFU" I yell before walking out the door and slamming it shut.
UGH that guy is so annoying, he should just date his brother since neither of them can get laid.
Anyways, after slamming the door, I begin to head to the bathroom... the girls bathroom... You see, at school, I only piss and shit in the girls bathroom. I do this because the ladies love it. They love watching me piss on the floor and mark my territory. Sometimes I even put on a show for them by drawing dicks with my piss on the walls.
Once I get closer I begin to hear moans. Perhaps the moans are just the ladies already submitting to me from the mere scent of me. The ladies can smell me from far away. Nahhh. The ladies couldn't possibly smell me from here. Maybe it's Nendo having an foursome. Nahhh. He always has foursomes out in the open where anyone can watch, like during class, or during funeral ceremony's.
Once I make it to the bathroom door I immediately recognize the voice of who's moaning. ITS BRENNIFER! I guess he's getting laid😏😏😏. Ngl I'm proud of him, he lost his virginity when he was 2 and ever since then he would fuck someone every other hour. (I feel like I shouldn't be writing stuff like this-)
I open the door and enter the bathroom. In there I see something disgusting. Something evil.
"WTF BRENNIFER?!??!" I scream.
Brennifer, who was in the sink rises up and stutter-moans, "he-hey Jake AH~"
I ignore what that TRAITOR has to say and look at the other person in the sink. It's Y/N...
"IFJDIHSISVSISHDJSVAISBSJZBjabshDJJDHSISBDISHSIDHSIJSJSBSJSBDIFJSISHAKAJWIIAIAJS" I let out my demon screech.
"J-J-J-J-Jake AH~ w-w-w-w-what ar-are y-y-y-y-y-y-you d-d-doing?!?!?? AHHH~" Y/N stutter-moans.
I stare at the 2 of them with my blood red orbs... THEY ARE FUCKING EACH OTHER?!?!?!?!?!?
I want to kill them for revenge but, I kinda care about them so instead I sprint out of the bathroom and fly down the hall back to choir. I headbutt the door down and dash to the teacher guy. I then proceeded to rip his guts out whilst he screams about agony. After he dies I feel myself calm down... that is before one of my classmates say something,
"Yo, That was pretty gory! Did anyone get it on camera???" He then proceeds to rap, "
Jake ripped his guts
Ngl that's kinda sus
But it was pretty cool so... so uhmm... so... shit what rhymes with cool..."
The person saying this is of course the one and only Juan Alvarez, or Alvie, or whatever the fuck that weirdo wants to be called. I decided to threaten,
"ALVAREZ IF YOU DONT SHUT UP IM GOING TO PUT YOUR ASS BACK INTO THE PSYCHIATRIC HOSPITAL YOU A ESCAPED FROM!!!!"
"MAN YOU CANT TAKE ME BACK THERE! THEY'LL LECTURE ME ON MANIC DEPRESSION AND TRY TO MAKE ME TAKE MY MEDS EVEN THOUGH NOTHING IS WRONG WITH ME AT ALL!!" He yells back.
"THEN SHUT IT DUMBASS" I screech then run all the way back home.
Once I get back home I get a pint of ice cream and listen to Adel while crying.
__________________________________
This chapter was fun to write, I liked randomly adding Alvie from house md. I don't know what else to say, I'm just trying to add more words so it seems like I wrote a lot.
Have a good day/night! 🧌🦤
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The Life of JakeyPooAlpha69 •it's satire I swear•
HumorJake just isn't like the other boys... he's an alpha wolf OWWUUUUHHHHHHHHHH Inspired by a y/n book I can't remember the title of this is rated mature because of swearing and sexual stuff... no detailed sexual stuff though Istg this is satire!
