A Love Like Water

Chapter 2 - Crestfallen Becky

- Becky's POV - 

Two years ago...

...life has been dull for me. I am an introvert person and I rarely make friends. I only have acquittances but close friends? None. I believe people will just leave and forget me.

Just like what my biological parents did..

I practically grew up in an orphanage where only nuns took care of me..

I was bullied by my fellow orphans..

I was always alone..

And I got used to being alone and I became cold which is now my defense mechanism against all people around me because I believe they will all leave and hurt me in the end..

Not until I met Freen.

This stupid, dork and cute human creature..

The person who taught me how to smile, laugh and trust another person other than myself..

The day I met her was also the day that I started to feel whole and alive. I smiled and laughed a lot. A genuine one. I started to make friends because she introduced me to her friends.

I became a new person in a good way.. I felt better.. No.. this feeling was the best..

I don't deserve her and I don't think she deserves someone like me..

A broken one, alone and lost..

We were a complete opposite..

I am introvert while she is extrovert..

I am melancholic while she is always ecstatic..

She is warm and I am cold on the inside..

But she was the person who taught me how to love..

She completed me..

She was the missing piece, the one person who filled all the void in my life..

I taught that the most painful feeling was when I figured out that my parents didn't want me in this world.

But it turns out, it was not..

Its when you found the person who made your life meaningful and in just a snap of a finger, that person is gone..

I don't know if I could move on, if I could ever move on from her..

*****

Three weeks after the whole agency conducted Freen's memorial, I quitted my job and packed all of my things including Freen's..

Our things..

I went to say goodbye to my fellow agents and to the chief..

As I arrived in our once happy and lively flat, I took out the box filled with our office stuffs from Freen's car compartment and walked towards to the elevator..

Yes, Freen's car. I started to drive Freen's favorite car. This was also the car we used when she taught me how to drive.

And this elevator..

Where we used to flirt and kiss because we can't wait anymore to reach our flat's door and almost got caught by our neighbors and we will laugh right after they got out of the elevator.

I placed down the box as I opened our flat's door and reach for the light switch..

I placed the box on the top of our dining table and slumped on our sofa.

Everywhere I look, I see, hear, smell and remember Freen..

There are so much memories in this place..

I buried my face on my knees and cried..

I don't know how will I ever start over again..

I wish I was the one who died and not Freen. I wish I insisted to stay with her while she planted the bomb and shielded my body to her.

Freen would definitely be able to stand again if I was the one who died. Because she was the stronger one between us. 

I saw with my own two fucking eyes how she took those three sniper shots, I saw how blood came out from her mouth as she struggled to keep standing on her feet to be able to protect me and the others. How she said her last words to me.. And I only watched her then everything went dark..

I didn't saw her lifeless..

And I still believe she's somewhere out there..

I hope..

Hoping..

*****

Days had passed, I started to have sleepless night. 

And when I fall asleep, I would have nightmares of what happened. I kept dreaming about Freen getting shot over and over again and then I will wake up crying..

My body started to weaken and I got dark circles under my eyes. 

I lost so much weight as I don't eat much and I got dehydrated as well.

I got so depressed and one day Freen's bestfriend Nam who also became my close friend when Freen introduced me to her decided to pay me a visit to check on me.

Nam knew where Freen keeps her other duplicate keycard..

Nam found me unconscious while sitting and leaning my back on one of the kitchen's cabinet.

*****

I woke up again in the hospital bed with Nam beside me.

I feel so weak and my body feels so hot right now even though the room's air condition was cold.

Chronic Stress

I started to suffer from Chronic Stress which causes me to have high fevers.

I got it because I have been very stressed and haven't eaten and drink properly..

I guess my life will be like this now..

.