A romantic adventure

Chapter 30- Alive again

( TW: REFERENCES TO SUICIDE SKIP IF IT TRIGGERS YOU)

"Severus, you two were so lovely," he said to me. I was surprised to hear him saying that.

"Wait, aren't you-"

"No I will not turn you in, I've seen how happy you are with her, it made me glad to know that someone was making you happy again,"

"I- thank you,"

"I know how much you love her, Severus. And I will not do anything to stop it. She's truly lucky to have you and you're lucky to have her, not even Lily made you this happy, I've seen you both," he smiled at me. It was a very wholesome moment, to know that I wasn't going to lose my job for dating (y/n). At least he cared for mine and her happiness.

I heard a groan and apparently Albus did too. "It appears that she's waking up, I'll leave you to it,"

"Thank you, Albus, you won't say anything to anyone else will you not even Minerva?" He shook his head as she was she was moving and groaning. Thank Merlin. I took her hand in mine as she moved more and more.

She opened her eyes slightly and I could feel more and more tears falling down my cheeks, I couldn't care less. My Angel was alive. "Love," I whispered. "Love, you're okay," she looked over at me and her eyes widened. "Love it's okay, you're okay," she opened her mouth to say something.

"Sev........ wha.... What hap...... happened?" She whispered back.

"You nearly bled to death, I can't express how worried I was when I saw you here," to this I saw her eyes glisten. She was about to cry.

"Love are you okay?" This is where she has broke down completely.

(Y/n PoV)
Next thing I knew, I was waking up. Was this it? Was this the afterlife? As I squinted more, I saw the ceiling of the hospital wing and to my left. Severus tear stained face, eyes all red. "Love," he whispered to me. "Love you're okay," he again whispered happily. I was in shock, I was still alive! But how?

"Love it's okay, you're okay," he repeated. I had to say something to him.

I went to open my mouth but I could only bare a whisper. "Sev........ wha.... What hap...... happened?" He looked down on me and his little smile decreased to a somber expression.

"You nearly bled to death, I can't express how worried I was when I saw you here," so, I had survived all of that blood loss. It made me feel like a failure, tears began to brim in my eyes. "Love, are you okay?" It had felt as if I was a glass window and someone had threw a hammer at me. I was bawling.

I had never bawled like this before, I could barely breathe and I just wanted to scream. Severus immediately snaked his arms around me and put my head into his neck. "It's okay, just let it all out," he whispered as he hugged me tighter. It was then I screamed into his neck, I kept doing it, I had just felt like a failure. A good for nothing failure who can't even escape from how cruel this world really is.

I felt Severus shake violently as he held me, I could tell he was trying his best not to cry as much as I was right now. This made me realise how broken I really was, and Severus was the only thing that could help mend me. I just kept on screaming into his neck, damaging my throat, I really couldn't care less. My screams were muffled so no one else could hear them apart from me and Severus. "I'M A FUCKING FAILURE! WHY DO I EVEN TRY?!" I screamed.

"(Y/n), Angel what's made you feel this way?" He whispered.

"EVERYTHING! IM WORTHLESS, I COULDN'T CARRY OUR BABY! I KEEP FAILING TO FUCKING KILL MYSELF! WHY CANT YOU JUST AVADA ME RIGHT HERE!?" To this I felt Severus shake even more violently. He had started to cry as much as I was.

"I won't do that, I refuse to! I love you, (y/n)! I can't live a world without you,"

"THEN FUCKING JOIN ME!" I screamed again. "JOIN ME! I CAN'T FUCKING TAKE THIS ANYMORE!"

"(Y/n) look at me!" He shouted. I looked up into his eyes and saw how much they glistened. "Do you know the amount of fucking pain others would go through?! Not just me but your friends too! And your fucking family! HOW DO YOU THINK THEY WOULD FEEL IF YOU HAD GONE?!" He started to scream back at me. I just lost it again. "I love you so much, I..... I don't..... I don't know......"

"D...d....d...don't....kn....know....w...what?" I whispered absolutely terrified of him now.

"I just don't know what I'd do without you, you've made me a better person in all honesty. If I lost you, I don't know how I'd forgive myself,"

"Why would you feel that way?"

"Because you'd be gone! I would feel responsible! Because...... because....... BECAUSE I'D FEEL LIKE I WASN'T THERE ENOUGH!" He pinched the bridge of his nose as tears kept trickling down my face rapidly.

"I'm..... I..... I'm sorry," he looked back up at me.

"Why?"

"I feel guilty for making you feel this way, I never meant for this,"

"Your intention was to die, of course I'd still be feeling this way,"

"I... I-"

"Don't say anything," fuck, he was mad at me now.

"I'm not mad at you, just annoyed and frustrated really," he said. Read my fucking mind again as usual. "Just promise me now, if you ever feel like doing this again, please will you come and tell me so I can help sort things out?" I nodded. "Good, just... don't do it again, you fucking scared me so much"

"Was is only you I scared?"

"No, you scared the absolute shit out of your friends, they wouldn't leave your side! KHANNA WAS BAWLING HER EYES OUT AT THE SIGHT OF YOU," this made me whimper again. I hated him yelling at me.

"I-"

"I bet your grandparents aren't sleeping at the moment because of they worry they are experiencing as of now, they care about you so much, (y/n). It's just you who can't see how much people care about you. Now then, we've had enough shouting matches tonight. I think you ought to get some sleep, and I do too, now that I know you're okay,"

"Can you stay?" I pleaded.

"I will, someone needs to monitor you so you don't go doing this again,"

"Thank you,"

"I love you so much my sweet," I didn't know if he even meant it as of now because of how he was talking to me just a few minutes ago.

"I love you too, you'll always-"

"Yes I will always be here. You don't even need to ask. Okay, wind down now, if you want I could give you some sleeping draught so you don't have any of these thoughts while you sleep?"

"Yes please,"

"Alright," to this he picked up a glass of water and tipped the draught in it. "Here you go, sleep peacefully now," he said as he caressed my back.

"Thank you, I love you,"

"I love you too," I drank the draught and then we pecked and I drifted right off into a deep sleep.