✓ LOVE TRIAL | HEESEUNG

46 - I Missed Us

Y/N's POV

As I stand in front of the house, I take a deep breath, calming down my racing heart. When I step inside, there's no sign of life. The kitchen is in pristine order, as if untouched for days. The place is very quiet and Jake's words hit me hard. He was right. I wonder if Heeseung is alright.

Our bedroom door is closed and I slowly approach it, my hand trembling when I reach for the doorknob. The laughter, the arguments, the stolen kisses in this very room feel like a distant dream when the door creaks and I catch a glimpse of Heeeung huddled on the bed, his face buried in his hands. My heart sinks, and I rush to his side, kneeling down to meet his gaze. "Heeseung," I whisper, my voice filled with concern. "Are you okay?"

He looks up at me, his eyes so red and filled with pain. He looks at me for a moment, taking in my sudden presence and it breaks my heart to see him like this. He tries to speak, but his voice catches in his throat when he wraps his arms around me as if clinging to the last shreds of hope. I hold him tighter, his body trembling against mine as he releases all the pent-up emotions he has been holding back. "You're here." He whispers, his voice barely audible. "I thought I lost you."

His grip on me tightens and I gently stroke his hair, making tears well up in my own eyes. "No, Heeseung, I'm here. I'm right here with you, and I'm not going anywhere."

"I'm sorry I didn't come back for you," He pulls away and looks into my eyes, and god, how I missed this man. "And I'm sorry for everything, Y/N. I'm sorry for not hesitating to lie to you. I'm sorry for hurting you when all I wanted was to protect you. I'm sorry for ruining your birthday, you deserve the world and so much more."

I reach up to cup his face gently, my thumb brushing away a tear that trickles down his cheek. "I know your intentions came from a place of love. But lying and keeping secrets hurt me more than you can imagine. It all just hurts, you know? Suddenly I have a father that Mom and Sunoo were keeping from me?" I pause, the name bitter on my tongue. "And it suddenly feels like you don't care if I get hurt or abandoned along the way."

"Y/N," He pleads, desperately searching my eyes for something to hold onto. "Have I ever given you a reason that I don't care? Like you're not utterly and entirely everything to me? I can't imagine a life without you, Y/N. You are my world and you're the reason I believe in a better future. My love for you burns within me, stronger than ever." He looks down at our intertwined fingers as we sit there, our hearts heavy.

"I just... I don't think love needs secrets and lies." I let out a heavy sigh, my shoulders slumping in defeat. "I don't doubt your love, Heeseung, but the way this secret was kept from me... I wonder if that's just the way your love will ever be."

Heeseung's face contorts with pain as he takes in my words. His grip on my hand tightens as if he's holding on for dear life. "Y/N, I promise that this isn't love to me. Love is me crying for days because the mere thought of losing you shatters me from within. It's the ache in my chest when I can't hold you close and it's me staying awake at night, consumed by thoughts of how I can make things right." His voice trembles and he wipes the tears off my cheek. "I would crawl through shattered glass just so you know that I'm willing to fight for us. It terrifies me to think I could lose you over a mistake I made."

Tears well up in my eyes as I witness the raw vulnerability in his expression. I can feel his love radiating through his words, and my heart aches at the thought of losing him too. "I was hurt, but all I can do is love you. You're my home, Heeseung, and now I'm back." It's in moments like these that I see the depth of his love when he breaks down the walls around his heart and bares his soul before me. It's both beautiful and heartbreaking, and it makes me realize that love isn't always black and white. Love, I realize, is not a perfect entity. It stumbles, it falls, and sometimes it shatters into a thousand fragmented pieces. It's never predictable and worth fighting for.

He's holding me in his arms and his hug feels like the safest place in the world. I bury my face in his chest, listening to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. Each thump against my ear echoes a promise, a declaration that he's here to stay. And I believe him.

"I'm sorry," He says softly, making me look at him with teary eyes. Then he leans in, pressing his lips gently against mine. Our kiss deepens, making me realize just how much I missed the taste of his lips, the way they fit perfectly with mine. He strokes my hair and pauses, slowly pulling away as he takes in my new haircut. A soft smile tugs at the corners of his lips. "You're even more beautiful than before." He whispers, his fingers delicately tracing the lines of my freshly cut hair. "Change suits you, my love."

A warmth spreads through my chest as his words wash over me. The sincerity in his voice reassures me that his love is steadfast, that his apologies are genuine. "Thank you," His touch lingers on my hair, his fingers gentle and affectionate. "I thought it looked bad."

He chuckles softly, his warm breath grazing my cheek. "No, never. You could never look anything less than breathtaking to me," he says, his eyes locked with mine. "Everything looks good on you, pretty." I bury my face in the crook of his neck, inhaling his familiar scent. The scent that reminds me of coming back home.

"I loved the teddy bear," I mutter, tracing circles on his chest with my fingertips. "And I especially loved the voice note." He holds me tighter, gently resting his chin on the top of my head.

"I'm glad," He kisses the top of my head and I smile against his chest. "Happy birthday, mi amor."

"You really know how to make a girl feel like she's in an Italian romance." I tilt my head up slightly, allowing my lips to brush against his jawline. "I love you, mi amor."

His laughter rumbles through his chest, the sound vibrating against my cheek as I press my lips to his jawline. "Anch'io ti amo, mi amor." His fingers caress my back in gentle, soothing motions. "Tu sei l'amore della mia vita e la ragione per cui credo nell'amore, Y/N."

"What does it mean? I only understood my name." I say, making him chuckle softly, his warm breath grazing my ear.

His hand sneaks under my shirt as he pulls me on top of him, making me melt into his embrace. "I'll show you what it means." His lips trail softly along my jawline and to my collarbone, leaving kisses all along the exposed skin. As his hands explore the curves of my body, his touch becomes a language of its own, speaking volumes of love, passion, and desire. He takes off my shirt and unclips my bra with one smooth motion, his eyes locking with mine as he does so.

That day, I learn a bit of Italian and that Heeseung's love is a symphony of emotions, playing the most enchanting melodies on the strings of my heart. And it resonates through every fiber of my being.