Broken and Abused (BoyxBoy)

❌✖️Chapter 3✖️❌

James's POV:

I woke up early on the bottom of the stairs. When I tried to stand I felt a searing pain in my ribs and legs. Memories from the night before rushed into my mind. I finally got enough strength to stand, and I limped up the stairs to my bedroom.

I looked at the clock and saw that it was only 4am. I decided to just get ready for school. I walked into my bathroom and started the shower. I looked at myself in the mirror just before I stepped into the shower. I. Am.Gross. I slowly slid down the shower and was soon crying on the shower floor.

I got up off of the floor and started to wash my body. I winced at the feeling of the water but it was much better then yesterdays. When I was done I got out of the shower and got dressed in a large blue sweatshirt and dark grey skinny jeans. I put on my converse and my glasses. I looked at the clock and saw it was still only 5:30am.

I walked back into my bathroom and grabbed 4 pain reliever. My heart started to beat faster when I saw the shiny piece of metal in the corner of the cabinet. I reached for it. The cold object sent shivers through my body.

I took it between my fingers and rolled up my sleeves. I slowly brought the blade to my wrist and slid it across long and deep. I felt relief fill my body. I continued to make art on my skin, enjoying the sight of all of the blood seeping from my wrist.

I pulled the blade away and looked at the mess I had created. The blood was still falling from my arm. I dropped the blade and then turned on the sink. I let the cold water rinse off the blood. I winced at the feeling. When I was done cleaning up I walked back into my room, grabbed my backpack and left. I pulled out my Iphone and saw that I left about an hour early.

I decided to just walk to the park and hang out there until I had to head to school. Then, I was trapped in my own thoughts. I thought about how I have nobody. I thought about how worthless I am. Why doesn't anybody care? All I really need is to feel loved even if it's fake.

Before I knew  it, it was time to go to school. I hadn't noticed I was crying until a tear fell onto the sidewalk. Quickly, I wiped my eyes and was soon at school, my personal hell. I walked in and immediately was met by glares of people I never talked to. I heard many people spit insults at me like fagget and fat amd ugly. I can't take this anymore.

"Oh look who it is. It's the poor fat faggot." I heard Hunter say from behind me. I winced at his words but continued walking to my locker. He surprisingly didn't follow me. I safely made it to my class to see MIkey making out with his girlfriend in the back of the class. It disgusted me. Not because I'm gay but they just do this everywhere they go.

I sat down in my seat and saw Mikey and Ally pull away and her leaving to go to her class. Mikey sat in a different seat then usual. He sat  in the seat in front of me. I started shaking and trying to make myself disappear in my seat.

He looked back at me with a smile. I flinched and he looked at me like he felt bad. I knew it was all just an act. He mumbled something that sounded like a sorry but I wouldn't believe it. I  know that people can change, but not this much and not MIkey.

MIkey has put me through so much pain ever since I came out when I was 12. I came out to him because I was once his best friend. He turned on me when I did and since then I've been alone and in pain. He never knew about the abuse at home because my dad was always good at acting. He also never knew about the selfharm that started when I was ten. I was good at hiding it.

Sometimes I wish that we were still close. We would always cuddle at watch tv and movies whenever I was at his house. He was always such an amazing friend but I guess that's over.

I was snapped out of my thoughts when Mikey hit my desk. I jumped and he looked at me like I was insane, and I guess I am.

"Do you have an extra pencil?" He asked me in a sweet voice.  I nodded and grabbed him a pencil from my desk. He took it and then turned back around. My heart was beating hard now and I needed to calm down before he heard it.