Blackmailing The Untouched

The Wrong Escape

"The scans and tests today show that the cancer has spread to my kidneys and my left lung."

I go silent. I'm trying to process what I've just been told, but I can't think. I can't breathe. I can't stand up any longer. My chest gets tight; my throat is hoarse.

"I'll come right away." I mutter helplessly. The words come out faster than Dad can probably understand, but I'm already in motion. "We need to -"

"No. I need to be alone." He says barely audible. My voice trails off slowly.

"What about me?" I start to cry. I'm desperate for him to listen. "What about what I need?"

"I can't." He chokes out. I know this is extremely hard for him, but it's hard for me, too.

"Dad! What about me?!" I lose all control of my emotions, and I begin crying hysterically into the phone. "I can't handle all this on my own. Dad!" I feel the tears sliding down my face, but I don't attempt to wipe them away.

"I need some time." He states. His voice is so cold, heartless. All emotion is gone from him, words coming out like a robot, "I need to face the reality of dying. I'm going to die."

"Dad, please don't shut me out!" I beg, "Please!"

"I'm sorry, Hollie." Is all he says, and then I hear the Dial tone on the other end of the line.

I stay on the phone for almost half an hour, but the longer I hear the dreary tone, the more my heart breaks. I'm frozen. I can't force myself to put the phone down, even though by now the call has been ended and there are literally no sounds coming from the phone. I can't snap out of the daze I've fallen into.

I feel arms wrap around me, but I can't move. The only thing that is real to me is the crushing weight of the pain I feel ripping through me. I can barely feel the arms that try to bring warmth back into my body.

"Hollie." A strong, calming voice plays in my head. It feels so close...

The arms embrace me tighter, and the stiffness of a warm body encloses me. "Come back to me."

All I can hear is that Dad is dying. Dad is dying. Dad is dying... I play the words over and over in my head.

Why doesn't he want to lean on me? Why can't we face this together? Why is he shutting me out?

A warm hand takes my head, and I'm forced to consider soft, hazel eyes. I'm slowly brought back to the reality of what is in front of me. Toby.

I can see his perfect face before me. I see his light eyes. I see his lips. I see his terror. I see his sorrow. I see his love.

"There you are." He lets out a sigh of relief, and his mouth slides into an easy smile. "You are not alone. I'm here. I'm always going to be here." The shine in his eyes tells me just how much he truly loves and cares for me.

"Dad's dying." I say in a soft whisper. "The cancer has spread, and I can't even be there for him. He doesn't want me there."

Toby wipes my tears away, "He'll come around." He promises me and then cautiously pecks me on the cheek.

His lips are warm on my skin, and I don't know if it's that reaction from him or my extremely compromised sense of control, but something breaks loose inside me. I lean up on my tip toes where I kiss him full on the mouth. He's hesitant, but he must sense how much I need this, so he breaks his resolve, and he kisses me back, hard and quick. His breath is ragged, and my heart pounds loudly in my chest. My hands quickly move to the hem of his shirt, but he doesn't stop me. Instead, he pulls away from my lips and watches me closely as I pull the shirt up and over his head. His eyes are burning with desire. He grazes his lips against mine again, his hand upon my face.