It Started With a Vacation

Chapter Thirty Three

When Crosshair wakes up the next morning, he's seemingly forgotten the events of the previous day. The argument, the official end to things between you and him. None of it seems to have existed. There are no signs that he'd just broken up with who had been believed to be the love of his life. His brothers are even more confused when he isn't in a sour mood like he had been the day before.

"So, did you sleep everything off then?" Hunter asks, spinning in his chair as Crosshair enters the cockpit of the Marauder.

"Sleep what off?" Crosshair responds, sitting down and slipping a toothpick between his teeth.

Hunter just looks at their other brothers before he looks back at Crosshair, confusion swirling in his mind. "Your mood from yesterday."

It takes Crosshair only half a second to suddenly remember everything. He can't hide his reaction from his brothers, who watch as his eyes widen and a flash of disbelief, heartbreak, and betrayal pass over them. A pain filled gasp leaves him as he stumbles back and falls into his chair, his face scrunched in a look of complete pain.

"Crosshair!" Hunter says, going to kneel in front of him. They have never seen him this emotional, not since their days as cadets before the Kaminoans beat any and all emotion from them. "Crosshair! What's wrong?" Hunter says again before turning to another, "Tech, see if you can reach y/n-"

"No..." Crosshair utters weakly, gripping his shaky hands in his lap. "Don't. She won't come. She won't care."

"What do you mean?" Tech asks as he pauses, finger hovering above the button that would send you a message.

"I lost her. I-I ruined everything..."

"What did you do?" Hunter asks, a bit more serious as his body straightens up.

Crosshair shakes his head, not looking up to meet anyone's eyes as he bears the truth. "I-I told her that...that this is pointless...that after the war, me and her would be nothing. T-that her vision of a family with me...it would never happen...that she should just accept it and move on..."

Everyone stares at him for what feels like days in Crosshair's mind, but is really only moments. The weight of their gazes feels like it's crushing him, but all he can do is sit there and take it. "You said that? You really said that to her?" Wrecker finally speaks, breaking the silence and looking at Crosshair in bewilderment. "How could you...?"

"I didn't mean-"

"That is ridiculous, Crosshair. You always mean what you say, and you always mean to say it. That's just who you are." When Tech says those words, Crosshair remembers him saying the exact same sentence back on Dohbar when they had first met you. Only this time, the words hurt so much more. Back then he hadn't understood how much his words actually hurt you. But now? He knows. And he knows because he lost you.

The others watch as Crosshair silently stands, but then he sits back down, not sure of what to do anymore. Should he try to reach out and apologize? Would you even want to hear what he has to say? Hunter shakes his head, going back to his seat to face out the viewport. Wrecker twiddles with Lula's ears, disappointment still lingering on his features.

Tech angrily bounces his leg, arms folded over his chest as he stares at Crosshair. There's so much that his brother doesn't know yet, so much that he should know, and a mistake like this won't make things any easier when the time comes for him to find out about Cyar'ika.

In a swift, sudden motion, Tech stands from his seat and walks out of the cockpit, stiffly stating "follow me" to Crosshair as he passes by. Snapping his head up at the harsh tone, Crosshair freezes for a second before following as he was told. When they enter the bunk area, Tech stands with his back to his brother, arms still folded across his chest. The air is thick with tension, and Crosshair's nerves begin to spike.