Chapter 10: 'Hey, man'

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"You say you love rain but you open your umbrella

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"You say you love rain but you open your umbrella.
You say you love the sun but then you find a shadow spot. You say you love the wind but you choose to close your windows. This is why I am afraid when you say you love me"
(William Shakespeare).

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I pull into my driveway, quickly switching off my bike and yanking my helmet off. I stare at the flowers neatly planted next to our front porch.

I'm angry. At myself for accepting that bet, at Jake and Rikkard for pushing me to accept the bet, and at Bianca for continuing to pursue me even though I've made it clear that I'm not interested.

No, you know what? I'm not mad at Rikkard. I can't ever be mad at him. I'm mad at Jake. He made the bet. He pushed me to accept it. He thinks it's funny. I wonder if he thinks our friendship is funny.

I pull my keys out and walk to the door, leaving my motorcycle outside. It's not sunny and it's not going to rain, and I can't be bothered to pull it into the garage right now.

I jerk open the door and set my helmet onto the furniture in the foyer. My parents aren't home to scold me about it, and they won't be home for a few more days.

Like usual.

Such a cliche. Absent parents to a rich kid rebelling against school and whatever laws my motorcycle moves me to break. Not many friends. Never had a girlfriend.

I break the cliche when it comes to girls, though.

My thoughts move to Nico, and I sigh as I pull a cup out of the pantry and fill it with water from the sink. I don't know what will happen this year with Nico. I hope this tutor thing tonight will be the start to something amazing. With my luck, however, it's very likely to end in heartbreak.

Worst case scenario, Nico flat out tells me she hates me and I disgust her, along with a lot of other comments that could severely damage me. I could grow up heartless.

Best case scenario, she falls in love with me, too, and we live the classic happily ever after, problems minimal and happiness maximum.

The realist view is that we could start talking and she might not develop feelings but grow mine and my hope anyways. It could end in heartbreak, her slowly disappearing from my life as I grasp for her pointlessly. She'd give her heart to someone else, like she has before, and I'd be a heartbroken shell of myself.

I'm scared now because it's a very possible reality. And when have I ever been the most important thing to anyone, besides Rikkard at times?

I shut the water off and walk to the pantry doors. I walk into the pantry and quickly search for the bag of chips I want. I grab them and make off to my room.

I check my texts and snaps as I walk to my room. I see a message from my mom and dad, both in the same group chat.

Mom:
Love you, Valen! Make sure to keep the laundry a nd dishes up!

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