(COMPLETE) The Teaching Elective - A Logicality Fanfiction

Chapter 4 - The Spare Seat in the Cafeteria

Summary: Logan decides to branch out and sit with his friends, but he overexerts himself and has a meltdown.

TW - Not personally a trigger for me but Logan has an autistic meltdown? All autistic people are different, but this is how I experience meltdowns sometimes.

As a daily routine, during lunchtime, Patton and his friends all sat at the same table in the cafeteria. It was right in the centre of the hall, near the windows so the group got light but not warmth as they ate. Patton always noticed there were six seats on the table though – and he had an idea who would enjoy that sixth seat.

"Hey Lo!" Patton cheered, knocking on the nearby bookshelf like a door. Logan looked up but said nothing, his mouth was occupied chewing the end of a pen as he had a notebook on his lap and textbook beside him. "Are you going to get lunch soon?"

This was not a part of Logan's daily routine. Logan's daily routine involved going to classes, and at lunchtime he went to the library in his corner to do homework and eat the lunch he packed. After knowing Patton for a couple of months at this point, he could deduce Patton was trying to be welcoming and let him sit with his friends in the cafeteria. "I'd rather stay here."

Patton tilted his head at the response, caught a little off-guard by how plainly the sentence was said. "Do you not have food though?" Again, Logan didn't say anything, although Patton could see a half-eaten lunchbox next to him. Right, Patton thought, if Logan was autistic he might need things given a little more literally. So, the cheery boy sat next to his friend and asked: "I'd really like you to come meet my friends in the cafeteria. Do you want to do that?"

"No, I'm fine here."

Logan could notice Patton silence, and that brought him out of his hyperfocus on his psychology homework surrounding the Yerkes-Dodson graph. He should really find a way to control that habit, he tended to forget general politeness when focused. "Sorry, I was just concentrating. You said your friends were in the cafeteria?"

The reason Logan's routine never involved the cafeteria was because every other student in the entire school went to the cafeteria. Which meant one thing – it was super loud. But Patton had talked about his friends a little when he and Logan taught at the elementary school – and he mentioned one of his friends was quiet and the epitome of anxiety at times. That likely meant the group had found a secluded, quiet corner of all the noise, right?

Well, wrong. Now Logan was sat in the centre of the cafeteria, only knowing one person in the group well, but that really didn't help the situation. Behind him was the football team table, they were throwing a ball that was bouncing harshly on the chairs and floor, and they were screaming like monkeys at every movement. Logan was facing the freshmen too, who must have just discovered cat-girls existed and were doing their best rendition. And add that on top of the general chatter, trays hitting tables, feet hitting floors, chairs scraping... It made Logan feel nauseous.

Patton was distracted by Roman asking him about the Education class he and Logan was talking, speaking for Logan as he seemed distracted eating Virgil's leftover brownie he was given as a welcome present. "Yeah, Logan and I are helping to teach first grade together, although Logan is going to petition to be moved to the fifth grade class in a week when we break up for Christmas – right Lo?"

Logan nodded - the only action he could manage as the football group screamed 'goal' at each other above the rest of the crowd. He can't cry in the cafeteria again, no way, he wasn't embarrassing himself like that. Just breathe... Just breathe...

"I need to move." A grumble came from Logan's mouth that Patton firstly assumed was in agreement to the conversation about the move to fifth grade. But then he noticed all his friends silence and give the new friend confused looks, and Virgil started to reach out his hand which Logan flinched away from.

Patton quickly turned to get the Rubik's cube out of his bag, he kept it in his school bag now he knew it comforted Logan during his shutdowns. But as soon as Patton turned his head Logan got up and walked away, leaving his bags, and pretty much running out of the cafeteria. "Is he OK?" Virgil turned to ask, but Patton was already on his way to check.

The bathroom was the nearest place that was mostly quiet, allowing Logan to pinch his arms and rock a little as he needed. And he cried – of course he's stupid enough to cry over normal noise. This was all so frustrating.

"Logan? Are you OK?" Patton was in the bathroom too, great. Absolutely perfect. Just what he needed.

Patton tried to show Logan the Rubik's cube, but he turned away at every movement Patton did. He was used to this; Virgil's panic attacks were similar and all that was needed to reassure him was a soft and gentle voice to help ground him. "Logan, I have the Rubik's cube in my hand for you..."

"I don't care about the fucking Rubik's cube!" Logan turned his head towards Patton's direction, anger in his eyes and a growl in his voice as he tried to speak. "Just leave me alone! Isn't that what walking away from you means?"

Patton knew the anger wasn't directed at him, but it still hurt to be shouted at. Still, a calm voice helped Virgil get through his panicked anger – and Patton was the only calm voice right now.

"What can I do to he-"

"I don't need your help! Leave me alone!" Everything in Logan's mind was frantic – he could notice that the sink wasn't completely off and there were drops coming from the tap, and somebody was probably using one of the stalls – but that was unimportant. Logan's mind had already gone too far. All he knew was that he hated Patton right now. "Go away!"

Logan threw a crumpled piece of toilet paper at Patton which missed. Patton silenced, just watching Logan rock in the corner of the bathroom, twitching, petrified. He must have tortured Logan by taking him to the cafeteria, and that made him upset to even think about.

Patton turned his back to Logan and silently left the bathroom to return to his friends. The world started to quiet again, and Logan's body started to calm, whichever irrelevant character that was witness to the meltdown also left the bathroom without saying a word. Logan still couldn't move, he was way too tired to do anything, but he did find his phone in his pocket.

The boy in the corner started to scroll up and down his phone contacts to ground himself and think of his next steps. All his other belongings were in the cafeteria with the group, hopefully one of them would be polite enough to leave his stuff with a teacher when lunch ended. Patton probably wouldn't do anything more for Logan – he probably hated him – this is why Logan could never have friends. No-one could actually like all of Logan's traits.

Logan's thumb hit the phone contact labelled 'Patton'. Mrs Torres-Rosario told all the students to get the phone numbers of their class partner just in case one person was sick and couldn't attend the class. Patton immediately gave Logan his number with a wide smiling face. Logan probably should text Patton to apologise for his meltdown – but he just couldn't.

Instead, Logan called the soothing voice that would reassure him he was making the right actions for his mental health. It only took two rings for the person to answer the phone, and their voice made Logan smile a little.

"Hey Mom... I'm leaving school early, I had a meltdown."