Only the "Strong" Survive | Paul Lahote |

*chapter twenty-seven*

|JONI|

Things are better now with the battle over. Jacob was healing, still a little gunshy on phasing but moving around and almost acting like his same old self. Everyone seemed happier, calmer, and relaxed for the first time I had ever known. It's only been a couple days but I was grateful for the changes it brought. The patrols were shorter so I got more time with Paul, Emily and Sam were talking about their wedding finally getting to do real planning and life just felt better. If there's one thing I've learned though, it's that things don't stay that way for long. So a part of me was anxious as I waited for the other shoe to drop.

I was getting ready for work as Paul came in. I had just finished curling my hair and I was struggling to tie on my apron, he stopped and stared for a moment only adding to my frustration. I shot a glare at him and he laughed, finally walking over to me and assisting.

"You always look so pretty." Paul said kissing my cheek from behind me, and then kissing my neck.

He left his lips there a second and I felt a shiver run down my spine, it tickled so I jumped away giggling a little. Paul's smile was wide, his eyes showed happiness and calm - I liked when he looked like this.

"I'm running late Paul, I gotta go." I giggled again as he was pulling me into him, kissing my cheeks and forehead and holding my waist against his.

"Do you have to? I can play the lottery, maybe I'd win enough so you wouldn't have to work."

"Not likely."

"But not impossible." He said with a wink.

We walked out to his truck as he would be driving me to work for a little while. My car was slowly being worked on by the boys, I wasn't in a rush to get it fixed though. The extra time I got with Paul and got to relax was nice, probably my favorite part of the last two days. He put his hand on my knee as he drove and I sang along to the radio. I can't sing at all, but around Paul I felt comfortable enough to do it.

"We're here." Paul said pouting.

I kissed his cheek, "I'll see you in eight hours handsome."

It was a Tuesday, so it shouldn't be too busy. Nancy smiled at me when she saw me. It felt like forever since I had seen her. Her boys father came back into town so she had taken a few days off to work things out and be with them, and with me taking a couple days off for the battle, at Paul's demand, we hadn't crossed paths.

"Hi honey!" She practically yelled hugging me.

"Hi. How are you? How are the boys?"

"Devastated, he just up and left again. Promised them he'd stay until summer was over, promised them we'd look at bigger houses, and in the middle of the night just gone."

"I'm sorry. You guys don't deserve that."

"Oh believe me I knew it was coming. Just wish the boys would understand, I didn't drive him away."

I put my hand on her back, rubbing it and trying to comfort her. Someday they'd grow up and learn that it wasn't her fault, but for now she chose to deal with the hurt of the blame.

"Oh, I forgot to tell you. That blonde guy came back looking for you." Nancy said, as she started clearing the dishes left on the counter infront of us.

"He came back? When? What did he say? Just once or a lot?" I replied, trying to keep calm and not sound super concerned. But I knew she knew just by whatever face I was making that something was up.

"Three times actually, kind of creepy if you ask me. He asked for your schedule, which I refused, said you were dating which I didn't believe, and said he'd just see you elsewhere. You're not dating him right? Is he stalking you?"

I took a breath, I had rehearsed over and over how to explain this to her because I just knew she'd ask about it. She was a motherly figure to me, so when it came to struggles and hair and make up and boys she always, always asked.

"Not dating him, we went out the once and it was bad like really bad. I don't know if it counts as stalking..."

She nodded, "If he comes back I'll call the police for trespassing."

The rest of my shift was filled with anxiety, everytime the bell at the front door rang my heart would racing expecting to look up and see Ryan. But he didn't show, and for that I was grateful.

Paul was right on time to pick me up like always, he greeted me with a giant smile and this time a cup of coffee. He was in such a good mood that I didn't want to take it away from him. So I put on a brave face and did my best to act like things were normal. I was hoping that after multiple times of not seeing me at the diner, Ryan had just decided to keep away once and for all. A part of me wished that there was more I could do, but it was too late now. My word against his would never hold up in court. I had only myself to blame for not doing what I should've done right after it happened, and though I tried not to think about it it frequently weighed heavy on my mind, and my heart.

We pulled up to my house, and Paul put the truck in park. But he didn't move to get out so I didn't either, the plan was to go to Sam's afterwards, like usual. He turned to me and looked like he wanted to ask something, but then stopped himself. It was just us awkwardly staring at each other for a few seconds because I couldn't read the situation and he wouldn't speak.

"Paul?" I asked snapping him out of whatever train of thought he was in.

"Oh sorry. Remember the other night when we were kissing and I mentioned that we hadn't..."

"Gone on a date? Yes, continue."

His nervousness made me laugh a little bit. When it came to me he was always confident, or that's how I saw him, and I felt as though he was always sure of what he wanted, clever with his words, and would have no problem asking a girl out.

"Can we? I mean, can I take you out on a date?" Paul asked, looking at me with one arm kind of scratching his neck.

I nodded and smiled, "Yes. Absolutely yes."

"Friday...?"

"Works for me. Now can we go inside? I'm hungry and I need to change."

Paul laughed at me awkwardly and proceeded to get of the truck. I did the same and walked inside, grabbing his hand to give him reassurance that I was happy and that he had no need to be uncomfortable. He waited for me to quickly change clothes and looked just as uncomfortable when I came back out. Immediately he turned for the door, so I grabbed his wrist stopping him.

"What's the matter?" I asked, trying to make a pouty face hoping it'd be good enough to get him to spill his guts.

"I just want to make you happy, and I'm nervous I'm doing this all wrong. Maybe we should've gone on a date before you learned about all the wolf stuff and the imprint? Before I ever even kissed you, I should've done this the right way."

"I wasn't ready to go on a date when we first met. If you'd asked I would've said no."

He sighed, taking my hand off his wrist and just holding it, "And you're saying yes now because? I don't want you to feel forced to do anything or be anything with me because of the imprint or I guess because you know about the imprint. It doesn't have to mean us as a couple forver, not if you don't want it to."

I looked in his eyes, seeing the anxiousness in them and seeing the longing for me to tell him that it was okay, that I liked it better this way, that it wasn't just the imprint. But that was only a half-truth, because knowing about the imprint definitely did make me more comfortable with him, it made me trust him a little more and start thinking about him more in a romantic way and less in a he's my savior way. I think explaining that would've been a little too much and a little too complicated to express in a way that made sense to anyone but me. So instead I grabbed his other hand, and put them both on my hips. I grabbed his face and pulled it down to mine, our lips connecting in a passionate, butterfly inducing kind of kiss that I didn't want to pull away from. But I did, keeping my face close to his and simply whispering into his ear, "I want this Paul, exactly this way, and I want you."