Only the "Strong" Survive | Paul Lahote |

*chapter fourty-six*

Moving in with Paul was as easy as breathing. Well, not the actual moving part, it took a couple trips to get all my things out there and it took two more trips to donate the furniture I still had. But once it was done, his home became our home. We decorated it with lots of movie posters, got a new bed set in a pretty navy color, and he even agreed I could use the shelf in the closet for my small stuffed animal collection. I know it was silly to still have them as an adult, but they reminded me of parts of growing up that I didn't hate - they were comforting in their own way.

There were difficulties of course, we bickered over chores, who would take out the trash, how to load the dish washer and much more. Both of us had taken care of just ourselves for quite some time so we weren't used to having another person in our space. It was a lot different than the sleepovers we used to have, but the nights were my favorite. Paul and I would put our phones away and talk about our days, he'd hold me and kiss me and much more most nights. I felt much closer to him now that we were living together. And I think he felt the same way because he's become less clingy and a whole lot nicer. Paul had become really good about giving me my own space, within our space - he bought me some canvases and some of the romance novels that I loved and turned the bonus room into my own little cave.

He'd also started working at the garage, part time for now about twenty to thirty hours a week depending on the needs of the pack. Right now, they were still very high, the Volturi would be coming within the couple of weeks - Paul filled me in on everything shortly after I moved in. He had told me about their laws, and the Cullen friend turned them in for Renesmee. I didn't like Bella or the Cullens myself, but it was ridiculous that this "friend" wouldn't even give them the chance to explain themselves before running to the absolute worst option. The idea of Paul fighting vampires again made me anxious, I vividly remember the screams of Jacob after his rips were broken by the newborns. I was hoping it wouldn't come to that again, or worse than that.

"It smells good in here." Paul said as he walked in the door.

I gave him a small smile and continued to stir the spaghetti sauce on the stove. He wrapped his arms around my wasting and kissed my cheek, holding me for a moment.

"What's the matter baby?" He asked when he pulled away.

"Nothing just over thinking."

"About?"

"You know what about."

I turned the stove off and drained the noodles, Paul didn't say anything else just grabbed bowls from the cabinet and set them on the counter. We made plates and sat at the small dining room table.

Paul sighed and grabbed my hand, "Do you wanna talk about it?"

"Do we have jalapenos?" I interjected causing a confused look to grow on his face.

I got up from the table searching the fridge until I found what I wanted and then returned to my spot. The spice was so good, I could've just eaten then and left the spaghetti alone but I know I needed to eat real food too.

Paul continued to look at me in confusion and then shook his head going back to his food too. We ate the entirety of our dinner in silence. But when we curled into bed that night unfortunately the silence couldn't continue.

I laid my head on his chest, listening to the rhythmic sound of his heart beat and found myself becoming sadder and sadder at the thought of never having this moment again.

"Joni?" Paul whispered in the darkness that had become our room.

"Yeah?"

"It's all going to be okay. Your heart is racing so I know you're scared, but it'll all be okay I promise."