•☁︎'𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐲 𝐂𝐡𝐨𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 || ᵏⁱᵐ ᵗᵃᵉʰʸᵘⁿᵍ

017

☁︎--𝐤𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐮𝐠𝐬

What to wear.

What to wear?

What do I wear ?!

The words are punctuated in different fonts inside the depths of my conscious brain,describing just the scrambled mess it has been put in after my visit with Mr.Kim just three days ago.

I've been staring at the contents of my closet for the whole of those three days,and nothing seemed preppy enough,to wear to the Golfing event.
I was told that I would be accompanying some higher up colleagues that usually take note of the media outlets positionary, meaning they would mainly be there to capture the event and the products of Kim Delicacies.

And I ,was there to gather an analysis of what their individual golf goers thought of our chocolatery  products,alone.

It's not as if I haven't worked with clients of my workbase before,but taking note of their opinions and forming and statistical analysis of their likes and dislikes forming around the chocolate delights could range from how it is wrapped to how it is shaped and the different array of ingredients that might be off putting.

I've laid out a decent enough plan on how I was to do just that in my head,but while I kept busy with ideas of how I was going to save my ass from being fired,I had completely forgotten that yes,I would have to wear something preppy appropriate as well.

I couldn't exactly show up in something too formal that might blow my cover when trying to mingle with the crowd ,but I also couldn't slack off and show up as if I'd rather fit somewhere along a fitness field either.

Which was so fucking frustrating because it left me in a confused state on how I was to appear physically on that fucking golfing field.

A sigh leaves me when I sink down onto my bed instead, opting towards the option of procastinating another day when it dawn on me,so awfully suddenly,that I only had two more days until the event.

And knowing how my closet looked currently,I knew that I couldn't even opt towards the option of fixing myself an outfit in the last few minutes,not if I wanted to make a good impression as an supposed golf goer,and neither onto that of Mr.Kim if I successfully succeeded in failing instead.

Would it be so wrong to just,not show up?

Of course it would,the answer to that stupid question was already stated even before I thought it,but God,would it be a relief if I just didn't have to go,at all.

An idea trickles into my head all so suddenly,and I grab my phone from the bedside table to go my messaging app.

Why the fuck haven't I thought about this earlier?

A quick tap to my search bar and I have Nayeon's name right beneath my finger,not even hesitating before going into our conversation so that I could lay out the earth shattering turmoil  I currently occured in now.

Hopefully her preppy style would be able to save my ass,or at least,half of it.

__

Maybe I was stupid,but at least I was stupid with a full outfit set for the golfing event set for tomorrow.

Meeting up with Nayeon was somewhat therapeutic,what with her sarcastic sense of humour and a long aesthetic coffee date,one could say my mentality was a bit healed.

Or maybe I spoke too soon.

"So...you've got the hots for your boss."
She leans forward in interest,her small curiosity risen smile having a shudder go down my spine.

"Yeoni,please."
I beg pathetically, already dreading where this conversation is supposedly heading.

It's been a couple months since my move,and given that this is the first opportunity that I've gotten out of my all so sudden busy schedule while settling into my new workplace,I've maybe neglected my friend abit.

Meaning that of course,it's been a while that we've speculated of my pathetic love life.

"Nada,I don't wanna hear it.
What I wanna hear,is more of this,Mr.Kim."
She immediately dismisses my attempt at steering the conversation elsewhere,and I can only slump in my chair.

"I have a boyfriend."
I say with the intent of stopping the discussion of my boss right there,but she instead just lift one of her perfectly plucked brows,and downs a judging gaze at me.

"You still haven't gotten rid of that douche?"
She sulks, folding her arms back to cast an disappointed gaze my way.

Something uncomfortable settles in the pit of my stomach,and I swallow past the constriction of my throat.

Yes,I was caught in a toxic relationship with a man that depended on me financially,and where it would be easy enough to cast him aside and tell him we're over,I just... couldn't.

How do I just throw away a four year relationship like that?

Even if our love soured down to his manipulation and toxic masculinity beating me down each time I tried to fix things?

Maybe I was little pathetic for still staying with him,but a part of me just can't forget the man I met and fell in love with,the small part of me that hopes every day that he would come back to me.

Most of our conversations are arguments these days,as I've been skipping going back home more and more these last few weeks.

I don't really know,how to go about my relationship with Fabio at all,if I'm being honest.

But none of this I tell to Nayeon,for I knew she would tell me what she and
... always did.

And leaving the damn man was never as easy as they seemed to make it.

fucks sake.

"Yeoni,it's not that easy to just..."
I try,but her frown doesn't even lighten the slightest.

It makes me queasy.

"We've had this conversation over a hundred times by now Zia...
You have to let go,right about now the only thing I think he actually is doing,is leeching of off his relationship with you,and that's unhealthy and an impending financial crisis calling your name right there."
She states, pulling her strawed ice tea towards her to take a sip.

I don't know how to respond to that,and knowing how true it rings makes it even harder to think of a response that could argue with her reasoning.

We end our little meet up with a tight hug and another preaching from Nayeon,begging me to realise my worth,her words eating away at my conscious all the way home.

Is it odd that a check-in with my phone causes me to see three missed calls from Fabio and sours my miod even more as it plummets?

Is it odd that there's still something that sparks inside of my stomach when his name flashes across my screen immediately after?

Is it stupid,to hope that for once he wouldn't be calling to ask for money?

Maybe.

But I hope my doubt would be proven wrong.

__

Voila !
She'll get a grip on reality sooner or later,don't worry.