Adolescence just can't make sense

٠Twenty Seven٠

THE FINALE WTF

Vivienne's POV:

''Vivienne, Baby...He has called you like a thousand times, Please come out of bed and at least call him back!'' My mother almost begs me as I'm laying on my bed, Staring at the ceiling and crying.

''NO! HE'S LEAVING ANYWAY THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO!'' I yell.

''Vivienne, You know you can't let it end like this, Please just go to him and talk to him or whatever, But don't let it end like this. I'm sure he meant to tell you sooner and to make sure he brought it a little softer but he didn't want to lose you, Can't you see that? He really cares about you honey please!'' My mom says.

I manage to get up out of my bed and get dressed, Maybe I should see Billie for one last moment. I really indeed don't want out relationship to end like this but will it get any better when we talk today? or will we just manage to fuck things up even more?

''Well look who decided to finally make up her mind and go talk with that poor boy!'' My mom raises an eyebrow as she's see's me while she's cooking breakfast for Mike. I look like living hell, Eyeliner and mascara completely smudged everywhere and just look like a disaster.

I quickly take my keys and my purse and close the door behind me, I need to see Billie. I need to.

I ring his doorbell, His mother opens the door. ''Vivienne...'' She says as she opens her arms, ready to hug me. I'm already on the edge of crying again. ''Vivienne I'm sorry, are you here to talk to him right now?'' She asks me as I finally decide to give her the hug she wanted. 

''Yeah, I am. I realized we couldn't end things like this.''

I immediately head upstairs to Billie's room, I find him on his bed with headphones on, Blasting music. 

He must probably be deaf already at this point. 

He's playing guitar and writing in his journal, Probably writing some stupid song about how I was about to ruin his dreams or something.

I knock on the door, but he doesn't notice so instead I just way in his doorway for him to take notice of me. I'm not gonna interrupt him during song writing, He absolutely despises that.

He's crying as he's writing something down, probably indeed writing something about me. I can't believe he already felt the need to write a song about it like that. And I also can't believe his music is so blasting loud that he doesn't even notice me standing in the doorway.

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After several minutes of waiting and staring at him from his doorway he finally looks up and gets a really confused and shocked expression on his face. 

''Vivienne?'' 

He asks, As if he doesn't believe I was actually standing there.

He quickly puts his guitar aside and comes up and hugs me, But I decline and gently keep him distanced. He looks really hurt by this.

''Look Vivienne, This...This is a once in a lifetime opportunity for me alright? I can't decline this for some stupid education I'm never gonna use again?'' He pleads. ''Look, If you want to, I'd take you with me. You could be like our roadie or something, And we'll have the time of our lives, You can see the world with us while we tour and always be backstage and go to fun parties and meet greet people and...''

I cut his sentence off by saying: ''Billie, I have dreams too...'' I whisper, Trying not to start crying immediately. ''I want to be a psychologist, Study criminology and what not....I want a life too Billie!'' I almost beg him. ''I can't be your fucking roadie, Or groupie or whatever you call it, I'm my own person and I can't live off of your dreams only.''

''I have my own and I will fulfill my own like you're going to fulfill yours...'' I whisper.

''We will have so much fun Vivienne, Please....Why can't you just maybe give it a chance?'' He's almost begging me to come with him, He loves me and I love him. 

 This love goes way further than just a high school sweetheart or some kind of teenage romance or whatever...Billie was my best friend when I had nobody else, The person that kept me safe from the person that hurt me the most and the one and only who got me out of trouble. 

My all...The only person I felt safe enough with to cry about my grandfather to.

''Vivienne say something please...'' Billie stares into my eyes with a concerned look. 

''Billie I don't know what to say anymore. I'm not made for your rock star life...''

''You are Vivienne! It's not something you're made for, it's something you just do and roll with and as long as we're together it'll be lots of fun and lot's of happiness! please!'' Billie is desperate for me to stop repeating the same answers as the entire day but I don't know what else to say to him anymore, We can't.

It's over and we can't fix us anymore, Our paths will separate and we really can't bring them back together right now at all.

''Billie you and Green Day are going to go far I know it....You will even be at Wood stock at some point I'm sure!'' I giggle slightly through my tears and gently place my hand on his cheek and caress it.

Billie chuckles through his tears. ''No we're not Vivienne, We're still just a small unknown band and we're not making it to wood stock and you know that...''

''Billie I'm going to follow you guys, Every step of the way. I promise you I'll watch all of your music videos, All MTV music Live's , Every single interview and every news article.'' I chuckle but my smile almost immediately goes back to biting my lip, sustaining my cries.

''I'm not made for this Billie....I'll watch you from where you can't see me...But I'll always watch you..'' I say in a proud but saddened tone.

''Vivienne please...I can't lose you like this, We can't break up like this and you know that too!'' He begs me as he starts pacing around in his room.

''Billie I have a life, You have one too and we both have dreams we need to fulfill okay!? And that's exactly what we are going to do! We are not going to keep up with our bullshit excuses on why one or another should come with the other because we can't and we both know that damn well! We have come to an natural end, We are separating our paths and that's how simply it will end, And there's nothing that we can do about it...''

''That's life huh?''

''That's adolescence...''

''Adolescence really doesn't make sense at all...''

''I know'' I chuckle, We're both crying and laughing at the same time, There hasn't really been a fight for our break up, only love.

broken love.

''I'll never forget you Vivienne....'' Billie steps closer to me, Indicating he wants to hug me.
I lean in closer, letting him. 

He gently kisses my lips and whispers: 

''We'll meet again...I'm sure...''

A/N: The fucking end...The fucking end...