WHY FOREVER

Chapter 18

 chapter 18....... very short i think

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“Sabrina are you serious you actually got into a fight” I nodded my head at jasmine. She came over two hours after Justin dropped me off. “Oh god I can’t believe I wasn’t there and nick that son of a bit-” I raised my hand to stop her. I don’t even why I am defending him what he did was disrespectful.

“Did he at least call you” I nodded my head “ten times he stopped an hour ago” I frowned at that. We sat there on my bed just thinking “I heard Justin was on a date when you called him” what? Why didn’t he say anything? “Really he didn’t mention it” jasmine snorted at me “do you think he would” I guess not. “so what are you going to do” I really don’t know how to handle this situation why doesn’t he see it from my point of view “I don’t know jaz maybe this is a sign that it’s not a good time to be in a relationship” she stood at that “no Sabrina you shouldn’t regret being with Nicholas yeah he’s a bastard but you have to give him time Sabrina I know he’s good for you they way you to have that special connection is amazing don’t give up yet” I looked at her shouldn’t she be on my side.

Well she wasn’t one to hold her tongue for anyone and she has never been wrong. I sighed should I give him another chance I don’t this to end up exactly how me and Justin did. Justin if he didn’t leave would we still be together would we have been happy. I can’t help but think of the possibilities of us I know I cannot give Justin another chance but Nicholas I can. “ok…so jasmine how are you and Johnny” her eyes lit up “just great I never met anyone like him Sabrina just the thought of him makes me smile” I smiled a little at that I know how she feels “he’s the one Sabrina I can feel it” I chuckled at her “well just don’t rush things ok” she smirked “when do I ever” she had a point. “Girls I’m home” my mom yelled at us “we are upstairs” I yelled back.

I laid my head back on my bed things today was really crazy  “well I should get going my mom wants me to go shopping with her” I laughed at that my aunt is a shop a holic “good luck with that” jasmine laughed and left out my room closing it behind her.

Great I am left with my thoughts. Not good my mind already went to Nicholas; I blushed reliving our night together. God being so close to him made me feel so amazing; his lips were like a drug and just being there alone with him took away all the bad things. If only today would’ve went well it would’ve been perfect. I frowned if only my little sister and dad was here to meet him I can hear my little sister now “what a hotty sanny can we keep him” I laughed at that my little sister thought everything was hot she got the word from a magazine my mom forgot to put up she never said cute again.

And dad I can just hear his voice trying to be stern but failing miserably “my daughter can only go out with gentlemen if you try to touch her in any way I will handle you personally” god how I missed them. If the accident wouldn’t never happened they would be here and I wouldn’t feel so alone. The accident... I remember that day I was sick and didn’t want to go to school so my dad took my little sister because she had choir practice and begged him to get her there on time. My dad kissed me on my forehead and I hugged my sister like I did every morning.

If only I could’ve stopped it somehow… the cops said the drunk driver was speeding on the freeway and lost control of the car, unfortunately my dad and little sister was in the car behind him so when he lost control my dad did to. It was a major pile up on the freeway a lot of people was injured but it was only three people that suffered. The drunken guy died from a punctured lung, my dad died instantly from the impact of the cars crashing. There was hope that my little sister was going to live they rushed her to the hospital where me and my mom sat crying our eyes out she was in critical condition the doctors tried to help but she had internal bleeding that they couldn’t stop in time… just thinking of the pain she was going through made me cry.

I couldn’t handle them being gone their laughter I could hear through the house could see them walking past me or sitting by me when I woke up in the morning the memories was hurting me and my mom so we moved away. My mom got sick for a while from all the grieving and was temporally hospitalized leaving me to cope by myself. Even now while I’m thinking of them I’m alone. I sat there remembering them the ones I loved dearly only shedding tears when they faces popped into my head. I should’ve been in the car with them maybe dad never took the freeway when I was in the car my school wasn’t that far away.

I could’ve prevented it. There was months of therapy that tried to convince me that there was nothing I could do but I didn’t believe it. I missed them so much, I curled up into a ball on my bed and just stayed there not moving just letting the darkness take me and let my mind wander. Yeah they would’ve loved him I thought to myself. I stayed there for the rest of the day not wanting to be bothered by anyone they couldn’t help me if they wanted to.