Tough Love

disappointment..

Tomioka pov:

I watched as tengen got into the car and same with sanemi.

'tomioka- he was right, your a fucking disappointment' tengen said to me.

I looked over at sanemi, who had a disappointed look plastered on his face. 'S-sanemi..?' I questioned in tears. I didn't mean to hurt him - I didn't want to hurt him.

It was all my fault. He didn't deserve it.

'I-im... I'm disappointed in you, giyuu..' sanemi said and turned away. I was shocked, petrified, paralyzed.

I was a disappointment after all..

'I-i..' I mumbled but couldn't get snatching out as I sobbed. We drove to the hospital in a rush, breaking an unessacary amount of traffic laws on the way.

I was untied before we got into the hospital.

Rengoku was taking to urgent care, and I was driven back home after he was put in a stable condition.

I ran upstairs and locked myself in my room. I cried on my bed until my eyes ached, drowning out the notifications on my phone.

I heard a knock on my door before I heard the doorknob jingle. 'Giyuu..? Your friends are here to see you' I heard tsutakos soft voice say through the door.

'Tell them I'm busy,' I replied, and she left.
I could hear the front door slam, and then a rock hit my window. I peeked out a little bit to see it was muichiro. He was trying to get my attention, but I shut the curtain on him.

I didn't want to be told that rengoku was dead.

I was such a disgrace, letting my anger get the best of me.

I was useless.

I was horrid.

I was a mistake.

I went to my bathroom to shower and do my hair. I sang the song that I had sang sanemi.

'You are my sunshine~, my only sunshine.. you make me happy when skies are grey~'

'You'll never know dear how much I love you, oh- please don't take.. my sunshine away..'

I started crying again, and I felt depressed.
Why was I the one crying when rengoku was the one in the hospital, might I add that it was because of me?

I was a monster.

I cried into my pillow until I fell asleep.

-2 weeks later-

I was curled up in a ball under my blanket, still remembering rengoku's face when I had beat him up.

'Giyuu, your friends are here again - please come out of your room,' I heard tsutako say and knocked on my door.

God, I was a fucking 23 year old and had to get my sister to call me down like as if I was a child.

'No,' I said and hid under my blanket, away from everybody.

'Giyuu, come on - we will be having visitors. In a few hours.. very special visitors.' 

I was surprised at how her voice turned from sorrow to fear.

'I don't want to come out, tell them I'm busy,' I said, shutting my eyes to try to sleep. I heard the door jingle again and then a big thud.

'Giyuu I sear to God if you don't let me in I'm breaking your fucking door down!' A voice called out to me.

'You break my door down, ill break your neck!' I replied but quickly went to unlock the door.

The person quickly came inside my room and locked it behind him.