John and Marlena (Finally) Get a Q!

Chapter 25 - Too Late

The radiator heater hummed as its artificial warmth began to seep through the room. An overcoat lay discarded on the back of a chair and the mute television quietly flickered its brazen images onto the surfaces of the room.

The blonde watched the leaden sky with blank eyes. The wind had picked up again, and the people far below scurried for shelter as every gust tried to thieve their belongings and their dignity. The woman, from somewhere deep within, responded to the wind's howl with a shiver that went beyond cold, beyond fear.

A small movement to her right caught her attention and a mug of sweet tea was placed carefully in her hands. The gentle hand of a friend led her to the sofa, and she perched on the edge of the seat, as though comfort were the last thing she wanted, or needed. The numbness was the only thing that protected her now and she wouldn't sacrifice that. She couldn't. Not if she wanted to survive.

******

John sat like a statue as he read the first page of Marlena's journal. The words, addressed to him, leaped off the page to swim before his eyes in a collage of accusation. His heart seemed to pound with each word that echoed in his head. Each word made him feel like a condemned man. Not a murderer of the flesh, but a murderer of the soul.

Dear John,

To never see you again is pain; to know that you will spend the rest of your life with Kristen is more pain than I can bear. She has built her life with you on lies and deception. I hope, I pray that you will see the evil in her before too long.

I've always sensed that Kristen felt threatened by me, by the history you and I share. But she was very careful to keep her feelings to herself, until she found your letter expressing your love for me.

He swallowed hard, fighting to produce some moisture in his mouth. To fight this terrible falling he felt. He looked up at Sami, his eyes cloudy with pain.

"The letter? My letter?"

"It explains later on," Sami replied gently.

John's eyes were drawn back to the page as though the journal had a life of its own.

Kristen is so desperate to hold on to you she told Stefano which plane I would be on so he could kidnap me. You kept that information from everybody but Kristen and she told Stefano. That time he failed but for all I know she helped him again, and he succeeded.

A tear, quickly followed by another picked a path down John's face. How could I have been so *stupid*? So *blind*? How could I not realize it was *her*? The falling feeling was replaced by a mixture of gnawing panic and pain that settled in the bottom of his gut. All the pieces, the pieces that he had refused to see for so long were starting to fit together. One by one they were slotting into place. The journal was the missing piece. The key.

******

Q had forestalled Marlena's demands for explanations with the offer of a hot drink. She had tried to refuse, to let her anger be the guiding force, but when every cell in her body cried out for warmth she was forced to acquiesce. Her grateful fingers curled around the thick, yellow mug and the heat was almost agonizing in its potency.

He sank into the softness of the seat opposite her and with downcast eyes he began to elucidate.

"I did it because I care about you, Marlena." The outstretched palm of his hand stayed any interjection from her. "No, please let me explain. I need you to understand. And to do that you must hear me out." Sensing her tacit acceptance, he continued.