John and Marlena (Finally) Get a Q!

Chapter 118 - Midnight Combat

John pushed stiff fingers into the pockets of the robe as he took the stairs heavily, two at a time. He couldn't believe he had done that, just walked out on Marlena like that. It wasn't that he had intended to do it. He wanted nothing more than to take her to bed and pretend that everything was right with the world. But what it came down to was that he just couldn't do that anymore. There *was* something wrong. Something badly wrong and he just wasn't sure if anything that came out of his mouth could possibly *not* make matters worse right now.

It wasn't that he *wanted* to feel like this. He loved Marlena *so* much. More than life itself. But that wasn't enough to stop him from feeling angry and betrayed. Somehow, as much as he tried to avoid it, he seemed to be faced at every turn with memories and reminders of the past. Almost as if someone were taunting him, getting inside his head and driving him half mad with jealousy. And as time went on, it became more and more difficult to deny the fact that he was being torn apart by the knowledge of what had happened. What she had done....

His jaw clenched tightly as he crossed the living room in long, angry strides. He might not *want* to feel like this, but the fact was, he *did*. She had made love to Eugene in the same bed, and it didn't seem to phase her one bit. She had professed to love John and then with the merest of provocations, she had turned to another man, turning her back on her feelings, on their love.

And now, she acted as though it didn't matter that Eugene was still here. Living under the same roof, sharing meals, sharing laughter. Sharing more of her life than John was able to right now. Didn't she understand, or even care about how hard that was? It seemed to him that it hadn't even occurred to her that there was a problem here. That there might be a conflict.

But then, he knew well enough that frustrated friends and family had proclaimed her the queen of denial more than once. In fact, he had faced her down on several occasions when she refused to see what was totally obvious. Their fight about Stefano at the sanitarium the other day was a classic example. That was her modus operandi, to stick her head in the sand and pretend the problem didn't exist.

So maybe she didn't see it, because she didn't want to see it. Because it was too much for her to deal with. But that didn't stop him feeling hurt and angry and jealous. In fact, it made it worse. Because even she if she *was* in denial, he knew, better than anyone that it didn't make the problem go away.

How did she think it made him feel to watch her turn to Eugene Bradford when she was frightened about *their* baby? How much was he supposed to take anyway, before he lost his perspective completely?

He neared the kitchen, completely focused on his thoughts. It wasn't until he was in the doorway that he realized that the darkened kitchen was already occupied.

The subject of his jealous deliberations was standing with hands spread against the cool countertop, a tall glass of clear liquid between them. His head hung over the drink, and he seemed to be struggling for breath.

John couldn't tell from his viewpoint what was going on and when it came down to it, he really didn't want to know. He really just wanted to forget that Eugene Bradford had ever come back into their lives. That he had moved into Marlena's life, her house and her bed. And maybe even her heart. After all, John had heard her tell Eugene she loved him. And Marlena wasn't the kind of woman to lie about her feelings. So where did that put them all anyway?

The truth of the matter was that he couldn't forget. And he *certainly* wasn't going to forget when he couldn't even come downstairs in the middle of the night for a glass of water without running into the man.

He watched as Q picked up the glass and sculled the contents in long, thirsty gulps and he felt his teeth crack as they ground together. He wasn't sure he had ever felt this much hatred for someone other than Stefano. And at this point, he didn't even care if Eugene deserved it or not. He resented his intrusion, his constant presence and his overblown sincerity. And he hated the man for taking advantage of Marlena when she was at her weakest moment. A moment where she should have come to *him* to ask him what was going on instead of taking the easy way out and burying her pain in a doomed fling with a so-called *friend*.