The Life of Livana Garmadon

August 18th, 2023

The lines between good and evil have blurred so much in the past few years, there's no clear definition to each word anymore. In the beginning, there were only two sides. One side that wanted the worst for everyone, and one side that wanted the best for everyone. But now... there are so many mixes in between and sometimes, the world can be so damn messed up that you have no idea what's going on anymore. I certainly don't, with the elemental part of myself.

I stared at the palms of my hands, which were once ordinary, but now are not. My fingers tingled underneath my skin and the veins at my wrists glowed a bright purple. I clenched my hands into loose fists and when I opened up my hands again, they had gone back to normal, the purple veins fading away.

I haven't heard much from Older me for a while. I thought to myself, laying on my side on my bed as I stared out the window, watching as the clouds covered the sun, hinting at some rain to come. I let out a sigh and closed my eyes, wishing that I could just silence my thoughts for a second and have peace of mind. But that was impossible now, so I had to accept that.

Turning onto my back so I faced the ceiling, I opened my eyes again, staring at the white paint on the wall... before everything faded to black.

-:-:-:-:-

"Ask and you shall receive." I murmured to myself as I walked underneath that beautiful purple sky again, lazy dragon shadows floating above me. I fidgeted with my fingers and then heard my own voice.

"Hey, kid." I turned around to find Older me sitting against a tree, looking at something in her hands. When she shifted, I realized that it was an apple, and she bit into it, looking over at me. "Well, don't just stand there. Get over here."

"Are you hungry?" I asked her, nudging my chin towards the apple.

"A little." Older me said, shrugging one shoulder and then taking another bite of the apple. "You want one? I'm pretty sure I've got an extra."

"Nah, I'm good. Who knows what dream apples are going to do to me when I wake up?" I smirked, "You know, it's funny. I was just thinking about you before I fell asleep. And now here I am."

Older me snorted, finished her apple, stood up, and then brushed off her pants as she said, "Ask and you shall receive."

"That's what I said." I let out a light laugh. My eyebrows furrowed, "Hey, I know I've asked you this before, but... did we ever manage to figure out... the elemental part of ourselves?" I asked, lighting up my hands in purple flame and watching my power crackle before I extinguished it.

"Mmm." Older me let out a soft thoughtful hum, "I'll admit, kid, it's hard to figure out that part of yourself. Our power is darkness, and it's hard to figure it out exactly. Darkness is always changing, always shifting, never in one single form at a time. I've never really been able to pinpoint my elemental side for a long time, and honestly, I've left it as is. You should let it go, kid. I know it's hard, not knowing that side of you, but you should let it go."

"Why?" I asked softly.

"Because it'll save you a bunch of headaches, and besides, you'll get to discover new things about yourself every single day." Older me shrugged, "Trust the process, kid. Stop worrying about what's going to happen every single second. You can let go."

"It's hard to do that. I'm worried..." I trailed off.

"I know, kid. I know." Older me took my hand and we both sat down on the ground, facing each other. "But listen to me, okay? Sometimes, you just have to let go. You have to let things take their own course, instead of worrying about every single second before you that you haven't experienced. You need to take matters into your own hands sometimes, but sometimes you can just relax. I get it, it's hard, I was once your age, you know. And I was you, so that makes sense. Chill sometimes. Just relax."

"Easier said than done." I murmured, "But I'll give it my best shot."

"That's the spirit, kid." Older me grinned.

I smiled and then said, "Oh by the way, one more question."

"Hit me." Older me said, "Metaphorically speaking, of course."

"Who was that mysterious figure next to you in the last dream? Because I know it wasn't Lloyd." I crossed my arms casually, "Was it... Floyd?"

Older me pursed her lips together, as if she had a million secrets but couldn't reveal them. She only smiled and then spread her arms, "You have to let things take their own course, Livvy. Remember that."

Before I could get a word out, she was gone, and then... so was I.

-:-:-:-:-

I snapped awake and then blinked, staring up at the ceiling once more. I groaned and then rubbed my eyes.

"I hate how mysterious I'll grow up to be." I muttered to myself, laying my arm over my eyes. Don't stress. I warned myself when I felt that surge in my blood. Keep cool. You already said you wouldn't panic and worry about the future. Be cool. It's alright. I kept on repeating that to myself until I felt a tad bit calmer. I slowly took a breath in through my nose and then looked at the ceiling.

Something inside of me seemed to settle and my heartbeat slowed. I felt a little more... calmer as I breathed deeply, focusing on how the air ran through my nose and mouth. I looked up at the ceiling, removing my arm from over my eyes, and then I thought to myself, Maybe... I don't have to know everything right now. Maybe... I can just breathe for a couple of seconds and not worry. I'll be okay.

So I laid there silently for a while, simply just laying there, my breath the only sound in the room.