Team Sparia

Chapter 25 - "Long Story."

Aria's POV
"Hanna?" I nudge the sleeping blonde girl on the back of my car seat and she groans trying to shoo me away with her hand. "Hanna we're back at your house." I laugh a little at Hanna's lame attempts to stay where she was. Eventually, she sits up blinking a couple of times.
"How much did I drink?" Hanna questions clutching her head. It was about one in the morning and Hanna and I had just finished our night out together. First we went shopping, then we grabbed some food and then we went out drinking. I hadn't drank that much but Hanna, on the other hand, was completely wasted. I help the stumbling girl out of the car and lead her towards her house. Ms Marin was still awake, probably from worry, so she helped me carry Hanna up the stairs. Her room was bare considering she had packed most things up beside from the obvious furniture. Hanna crawls onto her bed under the blankets and falls asleep almost instantly. "Sorry about her getting drunk." I say to Ms Marin.
"I guess since she's leaving for college and just wanted a good night out with her friend before she left I can let this slide." Ms Marin glances at the passed out Hanna on the bed a small smile on her lips. "Thank you for bringing her home."
"Hey, no, of course I brought her home." I couldn't have just left her at the club.
"So how is Spencer?" Ms Marin asks taking her eyes off of her daughter momentarily to look at me. I could tell she was concerned for Spencer, most people were, after all, she was stabbed in the stomach.
"She says she's okay but I can see she's not completely." I reply truthfully. Spencer always acted so brave and put together but I could tell that she wasn't all that put together. There were cracks in her personality. If someone so much as raised their voice slightly she would flinch and she always stayed clear of the kitchen knives. I knew that it was only time that Spencer really needed but I still think she needed to talk to someone other than me. Not that she really talked to me about how she really felt anyway. "I'm sure she'll get better." Ms Marin offers me a reassuring smile which I return.
"Tell Hanna to call me when she wakes up." I say already knowing that wouldn't be until late in the morning.
"Will do." Ms Marin says walking me to the door. Once I say goodbye I'm in the car and making my way home.

I open the door to my apartment expecting to see Spencer asleep in bed but it's empty. I can tell from the numerous dresses scattered on the floor that Emily and Spencer must have gone out, but why wasn't she home yet? I felt a ball of panic in the pit of my stomach as I searched for my phone in my bag. I pull it out and dial Spencer's name. The phone rings and rings until it finally cuts to the answering machine. I try Emily's number but the same thing happens. Okay, calm down Aria. Spencer's probably at Emily's - no need to worry. She'll come back in the morning. I toss my bag on the floor and change into my pyjamas before tucking myself into bed. I didn't like sleeping alone without Spencer, it reminded me a little too much of when she was in hospital. I couldn't sleep my mind was alive with worry. Why would Spencer not be home? What if something happened? But eventually, I gave in to a restless night of sleep.

I wake up to the sound of the front door slamming closed. I leap out of bed and timidly make my way into the living room. I heave a sigh of relief when I see Spencer - even if she did look a little worse for wear. "Where the hell have you been?" I don't even bother hiding my anger because Spencer and I never lied to each other.
"Long story." Spencer says not quite meeting my eyes. I was instantly suspicious. I studied her a little more, her hair looked ruffled from a toughs night sleep and her dress was wrinkled like she had slept in it.
"Did you stay at Emily's?" I ask raising an eyebrow. Spencer shakes her head no before walking towards me.
"Emily left with a girl I think and I..." She pauses like she was trying to decide on something. "I must have told the cabbie to take me to a motel because that's where I woke up."
"You stayed at a motel?" I question my anger dispersing and being replaced by confusion.
"I was really drunk Ari." Spencer says her voice tight. Her eyes kept glancing around the room like they didn't want to land on anything.
"Okay." I reply. I was still confused as to why she stayed at a motel but all that really mattered was that she was home and she was okay.
"I'm going to take a shower I feel a little gross." Spencer says already making her way towards the bathroom.
"I'll make us breakfast." I call after her. She disappears into the bathroom and I frown to myself. Something wasn't right. Spencer hadn't kissed me like she normally does when she wants to calm me down and her eyes hadn't stopped darting around the room once.

I load the toaster up with bread and start to brew some fresh coffee. I can hear the sound of the shower running. I wanted nothing more than to ask Spencer what was wrong or to kiss and hug her but there was something telling me not to, that she would tell me when she was ready. I take the toast out and begin to butter it and fill two mugs with the coffee I had made. I hear Spencer exit the bathroom and the patter of her feet as she crosses into the bedroom to get dressed. I start to eat by myself sitting on the couch my thoughts getting the best of me. I was so absorbed in my thoughts and worries that I hadn't noticed that Spencer had sat next to me. I turn my head and catch her staring at me her eyes full of pain before she quickly puts up her cool façade. "You're really beautiful I want you to know that." Spencer says quietly tapping her fingers on her leg a clear sign that she was nervous.
"Spencer," I pause looking at her my heart leaping as I do. "what's wrong?"
"I love you so so much and I swear I never meant to hurt you." Spencer looks at me, in the eyes, and I can see she's at the brim of tears - I can feel my own eyes filling with tears.
"You haven't." I say scooting closer to her bringing my hand up to her face and caressing her cheek.
"Don-" Spencer sighs taking my hand away from her face. "Don't."
"I don't understand?" I was starting to get annoyed my heart was going so fast I was sure it might fail. Was this how Spencer was going to break up with me?
"I have something to tell you." Spencer drops her head to look at the floor. "You're going to hate me and that's going to break my heart but I can't lie to you Aria." Her tapping increases and I frown in confusion my eyebrows knitting together at Spencer's words. "Remember my old friend Cassie?" Spencer asks nervously. I feel my stomach drop at the girl's name and I feel sick.
"Y-yes." I stutter waiting for what Spencer was going to tell me.
"I... I kissed her." Spencer looks at me now, the tears I had been holding back run down my cheeks in streams. I stay silent waiting for her to expand on what she was saying. "I was drunk you know I wouldn't do anything to hurt you Aria. I love you." Spencer gushes her voice taking a pleading tone.
"You kissed her?" I ask my voice controlled.
"Yes." Spencer hangs her head in shame and I get that sickening feeling that I had before.
"She didn't kiss you?" I knew what Spencer had said but for some reason my mind couldn't process the words.
"I was drunk!" Spencer protests sliding off the couch and crouching in front of me.
"Is that supposed to excuse what you did?" I shout back. She takes my hand in her's but I jerk back and stand up hastily away from her. "I tried Spencer!" I explode my anger getting the best of me but right now I didn't care. "I tried to help you!" I pace back and forth Spencer's words repeating over and over again in my head. How could she?
"I'm not saying it's an excuse, I'm just saying that I wasn't fully aware of what I was doing." Spencer steps in front of me halting my pacing. "Please Aria you have to believe that I would never want to hurt you."
"I can't believe you." I shake my head in disbelief. "I would never do this to you Spencer what would you do if the roles were reversed?" I question and Spencer looks at me confused by my questions. "What would you do if I kissed another girl?"
"Under the same circumstances, I would be understanding." I can tell by Spencer's tone she's getting angry.
"Understanding?" I scoff. "Really? Because I feel crushed." Spencer's face contorts into a look of pain her eyes glazing over with fresh tears. She's silent my words rendering her speechless. "I want you to leave." I say to Spencer my voice barely a whisper. All my energy had been used up and now, all I wanted to do was curl into a ball and cry myself to sleep even if it was morning.
"I will because I'd do anything for you and I really hope you remember that." Spencer turns and just as she places her hand on the door I stop her.
"Wait." I approach her slowly pulling the ring from my finger. I press the ring hard into her palm, my hand lingering momentarily, after all this might be the last time I ever get to touch her. She closes her fingers around the ring, the fresh tears I had seen building up in her eyes finally falling free.
"I love you." She says one last time before slipping out the door taking my heart with her. It felt like someone had literally smashed my heart into a million pieces. I lean against the door and slide down it covering my face with my hands and sobbing endlessly into them. Why did this happen? How could she do this to me? I felt angry yet heartbroken at the same tome. "I love you too." I whisper to no one. I reach into my pocket and dial Emily's number. I didn't even say a word because I was unable to, all I did was cry into the speaker and Emily said she would be right over. I hate her. I hate her. I hate her. Except I don't. I love her and that's why it hurts so much.

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