Team Sparia

Chapter 12 - "I love you, Aria."

Aria's POV
I'd been through a lot of things, all of which had taken some kind of emotional toll on me, but nothing had ever felt quite like this. I watch as Spencer takes off down the alley running at full speed. Even if I wanted to chase after her I wouldn't of been able to keep up with her. I felt my heart break into a million pieces. She doesn't love me, if she did then she wouldn't have ran away. I stood there staring after nothing before I made my way to my car. There was no way I was going to go back into the gallery I was barely keeping my tears in as I sat in my car. I drive home and burst into my house. Thank god my family was out becuase as soon as I stepped inside I completely broke down. I felt hot tears run down my cheeks in streams and heart wrenching sobs escaped my lips. I sat there crying for at least an hour before I pull myself up and make my way to my bedroom. She doesn't love me, she doesn't love me. The words just kept repeating in my head. And her face when I had told her how I felt had been so utterly surprised and she had looked so confused. How could I have been so stupid as to fall in love with someone who never felt the same way? That was the thing, I was certain that Spencer had felt the same way at least she acted like she did. I hear my phone ring but I ignore it unwilling to talk to anyone right now. I curl up into a ball and cry myself to sleep.

I was awoken by a soft voice and a gentle pat on my shoulder in the morning. "Aria, honey are you okay?" It was my dad and he was looking at me with nothing but concern in his eyes. I couldn't hide this from him anymore I had to tell him if not for me then for him. I shake my head and my dad pulls me into a hug. "Tell me what happened." My dad says softly.
"I'm gay dad." I say my voice sounding rough and hoarse probably from the crying I had been doing last night. I don't know what I had expected my dad's reaction to be but I didn't expect for him to react the way he did.
"I know." He says and I can detect a small amount of humour in his voice.
"You know?" I ask raising an eyebrow my sadness about Spencer momentarily forgotten.
"I'm your father Aria, you really think I didn't notice?" He asks but I know he's not wanting a response. "I made my peace with it a long time ago."
"Does mom know?" I ask curious.
"Oh God no, you're mom is completely oblivious." My dad says his grip on me toghtening ever so slightly. So I still had to tell my mom and she would have no idea, that sounded like fun. "But that's not what's got you all upset." My dad presses ever so slightly. I couldn't out Spencer no matter how much she had hurt me even if it was just my dad that was her decision. "This girl that I've been seeing, I-I told her that I loved her-" my voice falters and my eyes fill with tears.
"Shhh it's okay Aria tell me slowly." My dad soothes. I take a deep breath before continuing.
"She didn't say anything she just took off without a word. Obviously, she doesn't love me or she would have said something." I say sounding utterly broken.
"It sounds to me like this girl was scared." My dad says.
"Scared of what? Me?" I ask suddenly angry. Why would Spencer be scared of me? What would she be afraid of?
"I didn't say that. Maybe she lost someone and she's afraid to love." My dad says I calm down and my dad looks at me. "Aria if you love this girl then you should go after her, don't give up maybe she made a mistake. If- when she comes back listen to her." But what if she never comes back? I whisper in my mind I didn't speak it.
"Can I go to Emily's?" I ask trying to take my mind off of Spencer seemed like a good idea right about now.
"Sure, what about Mike? Do you want me to tell him?" My dad asks standing up from my bed.
"No I'll talk to him." I say dismissively and wait until he leaves before I begin to get dressed.

I knock on Emily's door and Ms Fields opens the door. "Aria?" Ms Fields says looking a little taken aback.
"I need to talk to Emily, can I come in?" I ask and she moves aside for me. I make my way up the familiar stairs and to Emily's bedroom. She was stretched out on her bed reading a book when she heard me walk in. "Aria?" She looks at me and frowns. "What's wrong?" She asks her voice sounding concerned. I thought that I'd be all cried out but again I broke down. Emily rushes to her feet and takes me in her arms closing the door so no one could hear. She guides me over to her bed and sits me on the edge. For awhile we just sit there with her rubbing comforting circles on my back in silence. "Tell me what happened?" Emily asks gently.
"Spencer." Was all the words I could manage. Emily grabs her phone and taps the screen a few times before setting the phone down on her bedside table again.
"What happened?" Emily repeats her words from earlier.
"I- I told her I loved her a-and she ran away." I stutter between breaths.
"What!" Emily yells both surprised and angry. "Why would she do that?"
"B-because she doesn't love me." I sputter and Emily sighs.
"Oh Ar, Spencer does love you." Emily tries to calm me.
"Obviously, she doesn't otherwise she would have said so!" I yell in frustration. Emily frowns at me.
"So you really believe that? Becuase I dont. I can see how much she loves you, when she's in the same room as you she lights up like I've never seen before. I really think she just made a mistake." Emily looks at me and I knew that she was being completely sincere. She gives me one last reassuring hug before she steps outside for a minute. While she's outside I decide to fix my makeup and pull myself together. I didn't deserve to feel this way. Actually, what I didn't deserve was for the woman I love to run away once I told her I love her. Everything is so messed up. "Do you want to stay here tonight?" Emily asks I hadn't even realised she'd come back in the room. I nod in response.

The whole night consisted of Emily and I talking about everything other than Spencer. I appreciated that Emily was trying her best to keep my mind off of her but it just kept slipping back to Spencer, her brunette hair, chocolate brown eyes and her beautiful smile that always made me want to smile. I couldn't even sleep. I was sat upright in Emily's bed as she lay asleep next to me. I jump when I hear a small tap on the window. I dismissed it as a tree branch or something hitting the window until I heard it again. I go to the window and look down. It was dark and I could just make out a figure on the street. I look back at Emily before deciding that maybe it wouldn't be an awful idea to go down and see who it was. I creep out of Emily's room and down the stairs careful as to not wake anyone up. I open the front door and step out into the brisk night air. "Hello?" I whisper yell. I see the figure step forward into the porch light and I take in a sharp deep breath.
"Hey." She says a nervous smile on her face. I wanted to hug her and yet I wanted to slap her. Is it possible to love and hate someone?
"What are you doing here?" I never meant to sound so bitter but I did have every right.
"Just let me explain, please." Spencer was standing directly in front of me now, so close her scent washed over me. I didn't want to talk to her but I knew that I couldn't not talk to her. I follow her to the steps of Emily's porch and sit beside her. "I never meant to hurt you, I was just angry and I wasn't expecting you to say that. Truth be told I'm a little afraid to love. It's just A took everything from me and he hurt everyone I loved so when you said that you loved me I was afraid for you." Spencer glances at me but I had my head tilted to the ground unable to look at her. I felt her finger hook under my chin and lift my head so I had no choice but to look her in the eyes. "I love you, Aria." She whispers so quietly I only just hear her. I felt my heart swell ten times bigger and an insane happiness in my chest.
"I love you too." I whisper back. I felt her finger swipe a tear away that had escaped my eye.
"I have loved you since the day I met you, I just didn't realise it." She pulls me closer to her and rests her head on mine. "I was a complete idiot before I really hope you can forgive me." She says. Maybe I shouldn't have forgiven Spencer as quick as I did but I had no reason to be angry with her anymore. This time it was my chance to comfort Spencer. I put my hands either side of her face and pull her towards me until our lips meet. At first the kiss was soft, gentle and sweet but it quickly became passionate. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest rattling my rib cage with such force it felt like it was going to explode out of my chest. Our lips were moving in perfect synch I felt her tongue brush my bottom lip and I instantly allowed her entrance. I relished in the touch and feel of Spencer all over me. As her tongue explores my mouth so does her hands on my body. I felt her hands running down my back all the way to my thighs sending shivers and waves of pleasure through my body. I hear her moan as I ran my hands through her hair and down her back. Reluctantly, I break the kiss and smile up at her. "That was one hell of an explanation." Spencer laughs before kissing my forehead gently.
"I love you." She says firmly and confidently.
"I love you too." I reply.