Dear Diary

my philosophy

Life ...
What is it?
Is it the daily waking and sleeping.
Or is it something more definite in a particular way.
I don't know .
Nor do I wish to...
Because know that what I have is not life but just existence in the worst possible ways .
I wish I wasn't born in the first place. Things would have been different. No one would have known me . No one would have liked me . No one would have bound me with expectations.
But there won't be any me .
That means I just am not there . Right?
That could have been so much better.
I sometimes wish that this world would come to an abrupt end and somehow everyone and everything that has ever existed vanishes into the infinity of the vast multitude of our universe. Peace, it is.
What would it be like though.
Will we just disappear into thin air or there's going to be a complete blackout or maybe an asteroid rain.
No one knows .
But I will surely be the happiest . There won't be any sufferers, to actually remember the dead . Whatever we are chasing and want to achieve will not matter in those times . Only thing that will matter to you would be yourself . No family and no friends. I won't care about anyone atleast at that moment . Because then you're just too busy saving yourself , rather than craving love , attention , anything that you've ever wanted just won't matter. every person that has ever made you jealous and bad about yourself won't exist . I wish it happens so badly.

I am sorry to any god who if once in my life heard any of my prayers