Melting of a frozen heart

Chapter 5

"I can't believe she is gone. I know we weren't very close, but I am going to miss her so much" VIpsania cried. "It's horrible that they would let something this awful happen to her. It's all that little district girls fault. Thank the Lord she is dead, because I wouldn't feel safe around the tributes if I knew was there"

I find it strange that Vipsania is making such a big deal over Arachnes death. We have both mutually discussed our common dislike of the girl. So her acting like the world just ended is odd, but not surprising considering Vipsania's love for attention. But her love isn't as strong as Livia's though. 

"Arachne was a big part in all of our lives! Nothing is going to be the same without her. She was such a kind soul, and I don't know what I am going to do without her. She was practically my best friend!" Livia scream sobbed. 

Vipsania's mask dropped for a second there, and with a glare she asked "I thought I was your best friend?" before putting back on her distressed facade.

"You are! That doesn't mean me and Arachne weren't close too. We practically finished each other sentences" Livia says through over dramatic sobs.

"I don't think I have ever heard you say anything nice about Arachne"  Apollo interjects, as his classmates sobs start to get louder "Remember when you called her a two faced cun-"

"SHUT UP APOLLO!" Livia screams at him, before going to sob in her hands, with her elbows resting on the desk in front of her. Apollo looks at her with startled pity, and gently pats her back as she wails.

Vipsania who sits on Livia's right, and on my left, turns to look at me. She wipes the tears off of her perfectly powdered face, and asks "Are you okay Treech? You haven't said a word and we are all worried about you. Since you were there for uh... you know" 

"I'm fine" I lie "Just processing everything that happened yesterday, and how life without Arachne will be."

"Oh I'm sorry dear" Vipsania says in a pitiful tone. One that makes you want to scratch your ears off "It must have been so awful to be there"

Livia's head pops up and shes asks "You were there? What happened? All I heard was a tribute went rogue and was going to go on a mentor killing spree"

I shake my head at her "I don't really want to talk about it. Also the tribute only went for Arachne" I tell her, she looks disappointed at the lack of information I told her. Then she went back to her sobs that are now sounding awfully fake. I just choose to tune out the rest of there conversation.

It's true that I wish to not speak of what happened yesterday. If someone wants to know more they can read the news paper, or just watch the Capitol news. I think Snow is featured in the article, and he was a first hand witness. If I wasn't off in lala land I would have given a statement for the press. But sadly I wasn't even aware that there was any reporters present yesterday afternoon.

The real reason I don't want to talk about yesterday is because it's making me think about her. _____. I don't want to admit to anybody that a district girl got her hands on me, and saved my life. I should feel ashamed about it, but I don't and that just disgusts me. Me and all of my peers view the districts as dirt. So to tell someone that dirt saved my life, and I let it, would be embarrassing. But it wouldn't be as embarrassing as it would be to admit that in the heat of the moment, I enjoyed the softness of her tone. And that part of me wanted to help her too.

I feel disgusted by how I reacted yesterday. I don't like her, but I accepted her help without thinking it through. Now I get to live with this newfound embarrassment. 

After some time I see Coriolanus enter the classroom, and call my name, while gesturing to go to him. I say good bye to Vipsania, then follow Snow out of the classroom who already has Clemensia by his side.