DIRT: the grunge diaries - Bessie's diary

Entry 187 - Why Should I care?

WARNING 18+ READERS ONLY! Strong sexual content and drug use depicted.

Oh dear diary, I wish I could tell you that I'm done being a groupie, and that I'm within Stone Gossard's slim yet comforting embrace as we declare our love for each other...however, I fear that ship has sailed after this fucking video tape that Maryann set up and sent to Stone. My attitude now is Fuck It.

I don't give a damn now, I'm doing the only thing that I know can soothe me, and that is to enjoy an amazing fuck with my flavour of the week, Mister Mike Starr.

I'm going down on him as he lays on my hotel bed, my knees on the plush mattress, below his manhood as I bob my head up and down, Starr's hung cock sliding in and out of my mouth as he groans slightly at the feeling.

He grabs my hair and grips it tightly like I'm a cheap hooker, and guides me at his pace, and no lie, this dirty and disrespectful exchange is turning me on to no end. To be treated like a whore, a slut, and treated like I don't matter turns me on in a weird non committal way. Like there are no strings attached and we both know that's all it is.

"Fuck" Starr lets out as I continue to work on him. He's a good size and gifted in the sex department, which is great for me, especially with my high sex drive.

"Ever thought about getting into porn? Like being in a film?" He asks.

I smile as my mouth is around his length, and I come up to respond to his random comment.

"You mean like Tori was?" I ask.

"Yeah... fucking hot. You would do so fucking well...I could set up a camera..." He suggests, idiotically, forgetting that my issues lately have been because of a fucking hidden camera.

I decided to tell everyone the situation, including my girl pals on the bus on the way here, it was difficult to do and Tori was worried the tape would get out to her parents. I assured her we'd deal with it, and since Jerry had the private investigator out to search for Maryann, it won't be too long before I can confront her.

Mike's response to the videotape was "Fuck yeah, I'm in a porno!"

Back to Starr's ridiculous comment about the camera...

"Smooth Starr, smooth." I say, looking away, feeling upset at his comment.

"What did I say? Oh fuck...the camera...uh, I didn't think. I completely forgot. I'm sorry. Believe me babe, I am just an idiot, I meant simply you'd be great in the Adult film biz...nothing to do with that hidden camera fuck up." He explains.

"Yeah, I don't think I'd ever be comfortable in front of a camera again because of this." I admit, a tear falling down my cheek.

Starr isn't very bright when it comes to certain cues, but he realises now, his stupid words.

He sits up and wipes the tear from my face with his thumb.

"Hey, pretty girl. Don't be sad, babe, you are worth a hundred times more than what you give yourself credit for. Fuck that Maryann bitch, she has serious problems, clearly." Starr says, turning on his charm and making me giggle in the process.

Ah, so this is how he gets so many women, that charm. It's like Jerry but more carefree and less possessive. However it's probably to make me feel better so I can continue our foreplay.

"Thanks." I say, wiping the rest of my tears away.

"Hey, come here..." He says as he places his hand on my back and pulls me into him for a sensual and lingering kiss. No lie, this kiss feels amazing. His expert skill at tonsil hockey is second to none and the way he flicks his tongue against mine, invokes a fire within my loins.