You Smell Good | ✔️

30 | Oh

I lay in my bed, staring up at my ceiling. I had my graduation gown on, and my cap snugly on my head. The beautiful blue fabric spread around me, and the golden tassel swaying in front of me.

"Ava, do you want anything? We can go out for ice cream or something. You just graduated, after all."

I sighed, as tears pricked in my eyes.

"I'm fine. Just because I graduated doesn't mean I should get any special attention."

"Yes it does, but whatever you say, darling."

I heard my mom walk away from my door, and I stuffed a pillow in my face, and proceeded to weep.

What the hell am I going to do? I don't know what I'm going to do with my life. I want to be an astronomer, but where do you go for that? I'm horrible at math, I wouldn't stand a chance. Maybe an actress? But my stage fright will get the best of me. Even if, getting in the school play once doesn't mean I'm an expertise. I must be the only one feeling like this. Calvin and Emma are going to universities, Christina is sticking on being a waitress, Amelia is going to culinary school, Nick is going to some university across the country. I just don't know anymore.

There was a knock at my door.

"Hey, Ava? Can I come in?"

Cassidy was at my door.

I sprung up, and wiped the tears out of my eyes.

"One minute."

I ran over to my dresser and threw some concealer under my eyes. Very sloppy, but whatever.

"Come on in."

Cassidy ran into my room, and gave me a tight hug.

"I'm so proud of my little baby! You graduated! Ahh!"

I laughed.

"Yeah, along with over 1,000 kids, probably."

"Don't act like it isn't a big deal, cause it is."

"Most people end up graduating anyways, unless they drop out."

"You would be surprised of how many people haven't graduated."

"Mhm."

"Do you know what you're going to do?"

"Not a damn clue."

"That's cool. Honestly, I don't know what I'm doing either. I'm just taking a communications major because it can go anywhere."

"...really?"

"Yep, and I can guarantee most of the kids you know don't have their shit together and have no idea what the hell they want to do too."

I laughed, cause all of my friends had a pretty good idea. I sniffled.

"Thanks. I really needed to hear that from someone."

She patted me on the back.

"Sure thing, girly." she said, as she walked out of my room.

I sighed, rubbing my head. My violent crying had given me a headache.

I took a makeup wipe and wiped my face. My eyes had gotten less red, so I didn't look like a clown.

I laid back down on my bed, and got my laptop from the side of me.

YouTube is what heals me the best.

I spend at least 30 minutes on YouTube, before I heard someone ring my doorbell.

My stomach lurched.