Sidelines

TWO WEEKS

It's been two weeks so far. I've been in a cycle.

Eat, sleep, haul myself to school, I took time off of work because if I didn't- I'd be crying infront of everyone.

The only people who've seen me this week would only happen to be Mahina. My parents got the vibe that we broke up and so they decided not to ask me about it for now- though I know they will.

The wags have been texting me, asking if they can drop by but I said I'd let them know. I don't feel like associating myself with anything hockey right now.

I deactivated every single app my name could be on to spare my mental health. I've been spending time on myself. More like bed rotting most days.

Lola is out of town so Eden and I decided to sleepover to give Atlas some company. I'm in my usual bedroom aka mom's old room. Nothing really helps but listening to my sad song playlist.

"RORY IT'S ATLAS" I hear Eden yell.

I always come rushing to Atlas whenever he's like this because he's like a brother to me. He basically is. But I look like the light drained from me and I don't want him panicking even more seeing me like this because I haven't told him that we broke up.

More like he hasn't heard me tell him myself.

"RORY" Eden cries.

I decide to come out of hiding for once and find Atlas sitting down in the kitchen by our snack cabinet.

"I don't know what triggered it this time" he cries.

"He just started having a nightmare and then he ran out" Eden cries and I see tears welling up in her eyes.

I try to comfort her at the same time because this one took her by surprise. We make eye contact and she gives me an apologetic look.

"I got this" I tell her.

"I'm sorry for bother-"

"It's okay. Go back to sleep" I say with a comforting smile.

She holds Atlas's face and says I love you before leaving the two of us.

"What happened Atty?" I ask as I sit down next to him and rest my head on his shoulder.

"I had a dream you were dying. You were in the hospital and you were there in the bed and it was like when we lost Lolo" he talks.

Oh.

"I haven't seen you in two weeks and I guess that's what happened" he finishes as I look at him. The tears are now dry on his face that he just now decided to wipe away.

"I'm so fucked up that I didn't even know you broke up with him" he says as he can tell by my drained face.

"I thought someone would've told you" I answer.

"I know it must've been all over the internet and Eden could've told me but I figured it wasn't her business to tell me" he goes on.

"It's whatever" I reply.

"It's not whatever you really loved him" he reasons as he wraps an arm around my shoulder for comfort.

"Maybe I thought I loved him" I answer.

"Loved? I saw the way you two looked at each other. It's the same way Eden and I look at each other" he reasons.

"It just hurts" I cry this time.

"I know Ror, I know. I've got you" he replies as he's the one comforting me now.

"I'll be okay" I tell him.