Shadow

Chapter 21: Loop

Icy needles of water, splattered against my skin, sending the cold waves across my overheated skin. I closed my eyes.

‘Am I confused? Between my past shadower and future husband?'

When I felt that he  must be somewhere near, my steps immediately advanced in that direction. But as soon as I received a call from Gabriel, I felt a pull.
Pull, that tugged me in an opposite direction.
At once, I ran in direction of my home, to get things prepared for tomorrow.
And truth to be told, it was not guilt for thoughts of my former interest that tugged me back but, it was my excitement that did the job.
His call was enough to send variety of sensations within me. But yeah, he did sounded cold, sending chills down my spine. But at the very least, he didn’t forgot to greet.

“How have you been?”

I took a pause, to camouflage my glow. I never wanted to sound like a teenage girl giggling and getting geared up after receiving a call from her crush.

“Totally fine.”

I turned around in direction of my house and took a little step.

“Hmm. Tomorrow, I will pick you up by ten in the morning.”

It confused me, and I stopped on my track back to home.

“Pick me up..”

“You forgot.”

I was about to ask him when he cut me through.

“To try on the wedding dress.”

“Oh yeah- yeah, I-I know.”

I resumed my march towards my home. In a slow, swinging motion.

“You know, but you didn’t remembered.”

I closed my eyes, he is not going to nag about the same for lifetime.

“I will be ready by ten in the morning.”

“Hmm.”

No goodbye nothing. And he hang up the call.
And even after this, my shameless ass jumped and ran towards home like some excited electron.
Once I was back, fumbling through my cupboard to find the perfect dress for tomorrow, my mind slowly drifted back towards the person who managed to give the same shiver as my shadower. I stilled. I lost him, once again. And again just because of my foolishness.
How can my heart flip for two different person at the same time.
I feel like I have got no backbone. Bending in both the direction.
To clear my mind where these men took a permanent resident, I had a blasting freezing shower. But no, it didn’t helped me in anyway.

Next day, as one can expect from me, I again turned excited and got ready by nine. And yeah, Gabriel came after quarter past ten. We travelled to Modanista in silence and immediately Gavin greeted us.
His eyes turned more icy after seeing Gabriel. I don’t know why, as far as I know, they both are close.
Period.
Just close, not friends. I don’t know if these two ghosts even have any friend in their life.
Gavin eyes turned soft as soon as they landed on me. Of course, Serena will scoop his life out, if he dare to pass me those looks.
We went in and together selected white tuxedo suit for him with black tie and particularly he selected a beautiful white wedding fit and flare dress that goes off shoulder with back lace-up.

“Try that.”

He pointed on that particular one. And without a word of argument, I went in to change.
I got myself in the dress, and clutching the neckline, I stared at my reflection on the mirror that stood tall in the changing room, one with the wall. I still had to get it on my shape by pulling the strings of back lace-up.
But i don’t know why, I kept staring at myself.
Why?
Even I don’t know.
Must be because this is too early for me to get married.
Must be because I actually never had marriage in my to-do list, this soon is out of picture.
And I, well looked different in white gown. As if I am stepping onto a new lane of life, and I am not even sure of this way.
Momentarily, the curtains separating waiting area and changing room opened, and a tall man silhouette reflected on the mirror. His face was not clear enough because of the source of light just behind him, but I knew who he was. His configuration, his fragrance, his shadow  was enough for me.

“Gabriel.”

I whispered and he took his own sweet time to approach me. With his every step my fingers tightened more around my neckline.

“I am not done yet.”

“But I am done with my patience holding capacity.”

A weird emotion hooded his blue eyes, and I let my soul dive in those beautiful ocean.
We both were talking about different things. And well, we both knew that.
He stared down in my soul through my eyes reflection. I immediately retrieved my eyes, freeing myself from my captivator.

“You should not enter the room this way.”

“And why so?”

He ran his cold fingers, through my back and something stuck in my throat. I looked up at him, and his gaze was burning on my back, all open and exhibition to serve his sinful thoughts.
I closed my eyes, as his fingers snaked and crawled on my skin. This feeling, these sensations, and that guilt; will make me go crazy one day.

“Gabriel you know I need time.”

He didn’t replied, rather his hooded eyes remained trained on my back.

“Try being romantic. More than your lust, we need romance in between us.”

I was going crazy.
Do hell with this romance, I was dying for his touch and one release of the building up tension within me.

“Romance hah?”

Gabriel smirked. Winding the lace ends around his index, he pulled the dress and me within it. My back collapsed to his wall hard chest and his already woke up buddy poked on my ass.

“I am done with being romantic Sydney. I am desperate. And believe me, you are not stalling time for yourself rather, turning the beast within me more wild for you.”

He whispered in my left ear. His warm breath fell on my pinna and immediately, I travelled back to my vanity room in Modanista, where I met or one can say, where my shadow intruded my privacy for the first time.
Same situation, same position, same whispers full of lust hitting my ear.
My breathing rate escalated.
No, what am I doing? How can I? Thinking of my shadower when with Gabriel. And this nasty things didn’t occurred to me for the first time.
This is wrong. I am doing wrong with Gabriel.

“Let me go.”

I tried to separate myself from him, but he without any efforts, pulled the strings more, and me along with that.

“Cant you feel me?”

He snaked his hand around my waist, burying his steel pipe in me through layers of fabric.

“Gabriel please.”

The touch I craved moments ago felt like shackles around my wrist. His proximity is not good for me. Not until i forget my shadower. And if Gabriel continues to hover over my head, I will never forget him.

“Please Sydney. Please. Tell me you cant feel me? Fine.”

He walked approaching the wall mirror, causing me to walk along and my front collapsed on the mirror.

“Ahh!”

He rubbed himself against me.

“Even now you cant feel my desperacy? Huh?”

He have gone crazy. Completely. Bending his head down, his lips found the nape of my neck. He nibbled the sensitive skin over there.

“Please, not now.”

I wriggled under his heavy structure. Trying just anyway possible to escape this hellish loop.

“Don’t try to do that. You are just stirring my insides more by your actions.”

I immediately stopped as his words crack though my skull making it’s way to my brain.

“I will leave you once I am done.”

He pressed his body more in me and his lips again found my neck. He bit my skin like some tenacious blood sucking creature.
I know he will leave me. He forced me but he did maintained a barrier. Where he never crossed the line.
But problem is me, not Gabriel. Where his proximity causes me to imagine be with my shadower. The time that was not much different from my nightmare, I am thinking of that period of time. The time when he entered my vanity room and I collapsed and shivered under his touch and whispers.

“No.”

I wriggled and pushed him hard, causing him to stumble back. Turning back I shouted on his face.

“Why can’t you understand Gabriel? That I..”

“..That you imagine that fucking bastard when I try to stir you up.”

He shouted.
I stilled.
I already knew that he is aware of my problem. He knows how I think about my shadower while I am with him.
But now, this act of mine has started to irritate him. I can see those feelings floating on his eyes.
But is it wrong to need time before moving on to a new relationship? Am I wrong where I need assurance before physical relationship?

“Gabriel, I didn’t..”

“Hush.”

He placed his long index finger on my lips and stared down at me with intensity, where his eyes felt are harbouring energy of fire.
His icy fingers lingered over my lips for more than necessary time, before he turned back and walked off.


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Your author,,
~Galen_Yana...♡