Shadow

Chapter 2: Eyes On Me

Same feeling crawled down my skin. The feeling I had almost a decade ago. Someone’s eyes brunt on me. I know this feeling, very very clearly.
I turned anxious and my breathing hitched. Smile on my face, eclipsed itself somewhere deep beneath my insecure feeling, which are similar to some dark hovering clouds.
I examined around myself, to find the source of my anxiety. I wished so much this just to be my assumption and nothing more than that.
The chitter chatter around me of guests, hushed. Nothing reached my ears, while at the same time, my palms begun to sweat. Any second my anxiety will hit me with it’s full blow.
Before I could sink deeper in my anxious dark world, Timothy my manager, appeared behind me like some magic. He whispered something in my ear which I immediately was not able to make out. But yeah, his whisper did helped me to pull out of that dark cave.
Everything around me returned to it’s perfect place, people’s chattering, clink of the glasses, hushed whispers, everything turned normal in matter of seconds. And what it took was just a small tug.
I asked him to repeat himself again and walked back stage following his trails.
I was the show stopper of tonight’s show. I have achieved this fame name for the time being now. Opposite to my anxious mind, this is quite an achievement for me. From being a shy child to a model walking down the ramp with attitude to create something new, something creative for people to look for, I have come along a long way.
As a child my parents were most supportive parents any other being on planet can ever have. But not a long time ago, their support turned a nightmare for me.
As a child supporting artist, constant flashing of the cameras and reporters stuffing their mic on my face, got me turn into an introvert. I left the industry completely.
But during my teen days, I again recognized my sleeping dream and started with my modelling chapter of life. But soon I felt someone following me. That constant feeling, the shiver I felt whenever he was near me, how goose bumps formed on my nape, was the root cause of my anxious mind. The way it all ended pushed me further into the ditch. Somehow escaping that world, I had a fresh start. But whenever any eyes penetrate the upper layer of my skin, it turns me back to the Sydney I used to be. Years back self.
The Sydney I turned to today.

When I opened my eyes, a reflection stared back at me, screaming and pleading to me that yes, I can do that. I can cross this vary obstacle. I have walked a long road, not to end up being afraid and crumble into pieces.
My make up was almost done and only thing left was my hairs. They were turning it into something beautiful for the show, when Gavin came in view.

“Are we ready?”

I exhaled loud enough to be heard and he immediately perceived the tension burdening my stiff shoulders.

“Just hairs are left.”

He looked at me through the mirror. Seconds passed before he again spoke.

“Helen, can you please give us some moments?”

My hairdresser walked out of my dressing room at once and as soon as she left I covered my face with my hand.

“What’s wrong Sydney?”

“I don’t know.”

I mumbled. I don’t know how much I should tell him. He is my best friend’s Serena’s boyfriend and also my employer. But I am here not because my friend is his girlfriend. But I landed here much before they met.
Yet again, he is my superior, will he be able to handle unstable show stopper, where this show is really important for him? He will not consider even Serena before substituting someone for me.
But even he is not wrong, what if I tell him about misshaping and he gets tensed? There are many responsibilities in his shoulders too. He is source of bread and butter in house of many workers under him. He can’t let himself just melt away.

I took sip of water from my bottle, before turning back to face him.

“I am fine Gavin. Just anxious before the show, you know.”

“I can understand that completely. But Sydney this is not the first time you are walking down the ramp. Are you?”

I dipped my head in agreement. I need to get hold of my shit. This is just my assumptions and nothing more than that. I am not even sure if anyone was actually looking at me. And if someone was, its not like I was attacked.
I smiled back at Gavin.

“I am ready. Please send Helen in.”

“Do your best. It’s an important night for Modanista.”

Saying just important things, he marched out and soon, Helen came in view. After my hairs were done, I was waiting for the show to begin.
When my turn rolled over, I walked down the ramp, but once again I felt the same feelings crawling down my skin. It itched my. And I almost froze on my spot.
Cameras flashed, every other pair of eyes were on me. But that particular gaze turned my feet concrete.
I turned to look at Gavin.
And he sat there, calm, as always, as if he do have his believe on me. Without altering my expressions any further, I gathered my courage from every single corner and walked back.
I went straight to my room, and slammed the door shut once the walk came to an end.
Tears fell down my eyes, smearing my mascara and mixing up with se foundation. Serena came finding me, she beat my closed door to get it open at once but I didn’t. I just cried out.

One may think, these are my speculations, but now I am sure of one thing. Someone is shadowing me closely.



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~Galen_Yana...♡