𝘔𝘺 𝘙𝘰𝘴𝘦 🥀

9

Her smile :

I had to go to Amelia's school today and pick her up early. They said she had a nightmare during nap time, asking to go home after. So of course I picked her up. She was pretty quiet the whole ride home. I gave her her peace.

But as soon as we got home, I picked her up and held her close. She squeezed my neck tightly, sniffling a couple times. It made my heart flutter and break at the same time. I hate that she goes through nightmares like this. Mainly because she's so tiny and sensitive. It can be the slightest thing and it'll hurt her or scare her.

What's crazy is that she's not scared of bugs or animals though....

"What happened baby?"

"I had a dream about the baby again BB." She whispered making my face fall into sadness. I kissed her cheek. It's crazy that she even has dreams about that. We can never understand the remembrance of something that ended before it came.

Long story short, she was a twin. When Mama gave birth, she was the only one that made it. The twins were premature and there were a lot of complications. I never tell anyone Amelia was supposed to have a twin, hence what I told Onika days ago. No one would even think that was the case.

"What was happening this time?"

"I was trying to catch it...but I couldn't."

"Was it running from you?"

"No. It didn't move at all. I was running but never got it. Why do I dream about a baby BB?"

"I don't know, Mel." I whispered but she heard me. It's not my place to tell her about that. Mama will tell her when she feels the need to. But until then, i'll continue to tell her that I don't know. "But remember praying will help. Bad dreams are just there to try and take your faith away. You gotta believe baby."

She nodded her head before giving me a little kiss and I put her down. It was just us two here since Anna-Mae and Solange went with our aunt to see some family. I chose to stay home and get some work done before everyone got back. Mama has had a long week and I at least wanted to have groceries inside and the place cleaned cause I can't cook for shit.

"What we gonnna do now BB?"

"What do you wanna do, sweet?"

"Can I ride the horse now? Mama ain't here and you can watch me."

"I guess so. Go change into your boots and ya hat. Make sure to get your bandana." I softly mushed her towards the stairs and got my boots from the front door. We got changed to go outside to the yard and I made sure she was good. She had her cute little gloves and bandana that matched. 

Cutie.

"Let's saddle up!!" She ran out galloping making me laugh. Such a goof. I met her at the barn, unlocked it and she got to the horse quickly. I watched her get Snow out plus led her to the field. She loves to take the lead of things which is something she definitely gets that from our Mama. That woman will push you out the way with a quickness. 

Most likely, i'm gonna let Mel do what she wants to do though. As long as i'm right there to watch her then she's good. Ain't no way she'll learn if i'm down her back half the time. Mama gotta learn that. But I understand why she be so on Amelia. She's tiny for her age. We be thinking she's gonna hurt herself and she'll get up laughing like it ain't nothing.

"Can I get up by myself?"

"You can't even reach it girl. Come on." I held my hands out for her but she folded her arms at me. Here we go. "Either come on or you ain't getting on. You ain't finna fall on my watch and I gotta explain why you got a damn bruise."