The Blood I Carry

That funny feeling again?

We buried him. It felt really strange. I didn't cry. I just stood there as Arlo and Grayson put the body into the hole. I walked away after that and i havent spoken since.

We also can't find food. It's been around 2 days without food so it's been getting really hard to even function. We've all lost a lot of weight, it makes me feel disgusting. Like I'm not in my own skin anymore. I'm not Olivia. I know that you can live off of water for a certain amount of time before your body starts to actually shut down, but that doesn't make it better.

I haven't felt hot water on my body for who knows how long. Hayden used to keep track of the days in his head, he was smart with numbers.

"Hey." Arlo mutters, sitting next to me with a leaf filled with water from the mystery waterfall. That's what we called it because we don't know what it looks like apart from Arlo.

I take the leaf and guzzle down the water, making my dry throat only a bit better.

"You alright?" He asks.

I look at him, thinking of answers. I nod slightly, then shake my head slightly.

"You haven't spoken in a day. I get that it's hard but, just speak? Please?"

"Why?" I croak.

Arlo sighs, gets up, and walks away.

I get up after him, my head spinning slightly. I quickly clear my throat.

"Arlo."

He doesn't respond, he keeps walking.

"Arlo please," I jog to catch up with him, grabbing his arm. "What is it?" He jolts his arm back, shaking my hands off.

I stop walking, allowing him to walk. A sudden feeling of annoyance takes over my body.

I speak up. "Why are you acting like this?" my hands slap against my thighs. I'm tired of my brother pushing me away constantly. It's not making me feel any better.

He stops. His head tilts to the side a little while his hands ball into fists. I step back.

He turns around, looking at me. His teeth grind together, making his jaw clench.

"No Olivia, why are YOU acting like this?" Anger takes full control of his voice and body movement. He looks scary.

"I-" I don't even know what to say. My eyebrows press together in confusion.

"You are over here acting as if Hayden was your best friend who you knew for years. Well he wasn't!" He walks over to me and stands close. So close I have to look up slightly to see his face. He continues. " Just because he died doesnt mean you don't speak for a day. Get over yourself! It's so pathetic!" He yells in my face. Tears well up in my eyes, my lip quivers.

He's never spoken to me like that before.

"Arlo knock it off." Grayson comes walking over and grabs my arm, pulling me away from Arlo.

"You okay?" he asks.

I don't speak.

***

Everyone sits around the lit fire. I hold my stomach as it releases painful noises.

Grayson bites his nails a lot, I'm surprised there's even any nail or skin left.

Brooklyn plays with her hair constantly, twisting it around her fingers, releasing it, then twisting it again. Over and over again. On the occasion she will find split ends, pick them, and then complain how her hair used to be so healthy.