The Blood I Carry

Go

I step on the plane, out of breath, soaking, in agony and confused.

I swallow hard, everyone who is already on the plane stares at me.

"Jude got shot, he's coming up with Jaxon now." Is all I manage to spit out. Valentina stands up immediately and pushes out of my way to look outside from the main door of the plane.

I look down at my hands. Red stains of blood coat my pale skin. Arlos blood. My brother's blood. His blood. I blink a few times, in my own world of overlapping thoughts before Jaxon and Jude come rushing onto the plane, part of Jaxons top that's on Judes thigh is stained dark red. I've seen enough blood today. Sir Cassander and Grayson and a medical staff go over to Jude to help with his wound. I don't know where to go. I sit on the floor in the corner in front of the first row of seats. Away from everything. I look at my hands again, the blood is slowly very slowly drying now despite my whole body being soaked from head to toe. I feel like i'm stuck on an endless train that never stops at any stations, it just continues and continues until it runs out of fuel. I chew at my lip, the taste of blood hits my tastebuds, it could be mine or it could be Arlo's. My mouth is dry so it tastes like my whole mouth is just bleeding, as if someone got razorblades and poked and prodded my gums and tongue with it then left me to live with the pain of it.

"I love you forever and ever-"

"I'm so sorry for every- everything, Liv."

"No. Stop it." I mumble to myself.

"I'm sorry my girl! I'm sorry for everything!"

I huddle myself in the corner and lift my soaked and dirty knees up to my chest, I wrap my arms around myself and hide my head, I start to rock gently like a baby trying to sleep.

Muttering to myself, I repeat the word I want the most. I want it all to stop. The voices of their last words replay and replay in my mind. I feel the plane take off. A feeling of nausea settles in my stomach.

"Stop it. Stop. Stop. Stop. stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop . Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop . Stop. stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. St-"

"Liv," c

I flinch and push myself backwards, trying to get away from him.

"Hey its me its me calm down, its Grayson, it's alright." He speaks in a gentle tone.

"Go away. Go away. Go away!" I raise my voice, only hoping to be swallowed up by the earth.

Grayson, despite being hurt and locked away with no food or water for at least 15 hours, wraps his arms around me and holds me. I try to fight him off. I try to push him away with my mind. It doesn't work. I'm too weak, I've lost blood and I'm hurt. I am hurt. I try with everything I have left of me. I get on my knees, I lunge forward, hoping to be left to be alone on the floor. It doesn't work. "No stop, get off, get off me!" I cry out. Graysons arms wrap around my arms and stomach tightly. He holds me until I give up fighting.

And so I do.

I give up. And give in.

We both fall back against the wall of the plane. He pushes my hair out of my face as I sob uncontrollably. He rocks me back and forth while I hyperventilate and curl up into a ball on his body.

"Theyre gone- theyre both gone and- and i cant breath-" I choke.

"It's okay, I'm here. It's okay." Grayson keeps on repeating, a slight crack in his voice as if he's crying as well. But I hear his voice. The voice that always calms me, the voice that makes me remember I am real, I am alive and living this life.