Addicted To You

21 - Broken Heart

Our last night together had been both one of the best and one of the worst nights of my life. It was the best in that I was with him and we made love off and on all night. It was the worst because it was the last time we could be together. I had to draw on every bit of willpower I had not to tie him to the bed and keep him there. After the week's activities and what we tried, we might enjoy that. But I digress. I also had to exercise that willpower not to spill my guts and tell him how I felt. I wished for the time when my feelings were unclear so that I could just ignore them.

We didn't just have sex. We also talked about our dreams for the future, you know, kids, careers, where we see our lives in five years, all that stuff. He told me that he had wanted to be married by the time he was 35, but being an idol had made that a challenging goal to attain. He wanted kids, but he wasn't going to rush them. He hadn't decided yet what he wanted to do career-wise in the future just yet. Being an idol won't last forever. He had done all the things he had dreamed of before he debuted, and now he was looking for the next goal.

What I wanted for my life had changed dramatically in four short months. I wanted a life with him. That is all. I wanted to be the one he married before he was 35 and I wanted to give him a family. This was all new to me. I hadn't even realized it until we started the conversation. It was a hard one to have, knowing that we could not be together.

I lied. I lied when I told him I wanted to be a bestselling author again and that I might get married if I met the right person. It wasn't high on my list. OK, so it wasn't a complete lie because it was how I felt four months ago, and I did want to write another bestseller someday. And I did want to get married to the right person. That person was him.

I had to tell him that because if I told him the truth I would break down and beg him to stay with me. I could see a sadness in his eyes that I knew he had to be able to see in mine. I hoped he wanted to be with me too.

We said our goodbyes in private. Don't ask me how I held it together because I have no idea. I was beginning to think that everyone I cared about was going to leave me. First Lucy, then my mom, and now Minhyuk. And let's not forget about my dad. I had no respect for the man, but I still cared about him.

We were leaving for the airport within the hour. They were going to Korea and I was going to Atlanta. I hadn't gotten to explore LA much, I had explored Minhyuk instead. It was better than sightseeing. I knew every inch of his body. I could draw his tattoos without looking at them. I knew intimate details about him that only the members knew and some things even they didn't know. I knew him.

We had to spend time in our own rooms to pack up and get ready to go. I cried in the shower and hoped he wouldn't notice my swollen eyes. Jinki was anxious because all her stuff was packed up except her food and water bowls. I told her we were going home and she meowed at me like she understood.

The asshole who had tried to kidnap her was sitting in a jail cell, waiting for his bail hearing. He needed to be locked up, or better yet thrown under the jail. I hoped he didn't know where I lived, but I knew at least he would not be following me because he couldn't. I still didn't know why he did it. I would probably have to fly back for a court date, but I was ready to face him. The only thing I wanted to know was why he did it. I was 110% planning to press charges, no matter what the reason ended up being.

I had everything ready and had it by the door. Manager-nim texted us that we needed to be in the lobby in fifteen minutes. My heart pounded... or maybe it was the door. I peeked out to find my love on the other side. I plastered a bright smile on my face and opened the door. He had the same one plastered on his face.

He pinned me to the wall as soon as he was inside. His hands held my face and his lips covered mine. He tasted my lips and they parted for him. His tongue sought mine and he set my body ablaze. I whimpered and wrapped my arms around his neck. I desperately clung to him. He was my oxygen.