One of the boys

Aftermath

3:43 am
"Still no answer?" I lift my head wiping my eyes. I look over at Mully laying in the lounge chair next to me. "Nope." I wipe my eyes once again. I take a glance around. Eddie and Grant are sitting by the pool with their feet in the water. Each with a drink in hand.(Grant's nonalcoholic of course.) I look to the left of them and Juicy is sitting in the hot-tub alone. His head is tilted up laying on the title that surrounds the pool and hot-tub. Hie eyes are shut. "He'll probably text in the morning." Mully says snapping my attention towards him. He leans over and places a hand on my back. I think I would completely crumble if I didn't have my brother. "I fucked up." I sigh placing my head in my hands. "You've said that a million times." I can just hear Eddie's eye roll. "And for the millionth time, Josh will get over it." Grant adds. I have said it a million times. We've been sitting out here for hours now swimming, drinking, crying. Well just me doing the crying. Mom was out here with us for a hour or two trying to calm me down but it got late and she went to bed. "Guys I'm serious." I saying walking towards the two men sitting by the edge of the pool. I sit down next to Grant and lean my head on his shoulder. "What if I ruined it, what if we can never fix this." I want to cry again but I don't. "You guys will be fine just give Josh some time." Grant says patting my head. "All guys get jealous but we always get over it." Mully says joining us by the pool. Eddie hands me his drink so I take a sip. I take my head off Narrator's shoulder. My eyes fall on Gaege. I don't want to lose Josh, I love him too much and would do anything for him. Except for one thing. Get rid of Juicy. I lower my eyes to look at the pool. The water is as blue as blue can get, just like Josh's eyes. I stand up not wanting to think about Josh. "What if he doesn't get over this jealousy thing? Am I supposed to just drop Juicy?" I speak as if Gaege isn't 10 feet away. "I love Josh with everything in me but Gaege is my best friend." "One of my best friends." I correct myself looking at Eddie. "Josh wouldn't  make you drop Juicy." William says in a matter of fact kind of way. He knows his best friend better than anyone. "But he already asked me to distance myself." I point out. The guys look at each other. "Exactly!" I shout after they don't say anything. "Josh wants Juicy gone and I can't do that." I start pacing. "And because I can't do that Josh will break up with me. Him breaking up with me would make everything awkward and I would have to move. And it would probably ruin your guy's friendship too." I spit out. Eddie stops me mid pace. "Calm down." He looks me right in my eyes. "Everything will be fine." He hugs me and I quickly hug back. I feel Mully and Narrator's arms sling over us. "You guys are the best." I say into Eddie's chest. "Can I go to bed now?" Mully sighs once we let go of the hug. I laugh "Yes." He places a kiss on my forehead and heads into the house. "I'm off to bed too." Narrator says following Mully into the house. "One more shot then I'm going to bed." Eddie chuckles. He hands me a shot glass and fills it with whatever liquor is left. "Cheers!" We clang our glasses together. I put the glass up to my lips and throw my head back. I swallow hard. "Goodnight." Eddie hugs me again before heading into the house. I take a seat on one of the lounge chairs grabbing my phone. Still no text from Josh. I look up from my phone. Juicy is still in the hot-tub, he's slicking his hair back with his wet hands. He hasn't said a word for a hour. I look to my side. There's still a couple of white claws so I grab two and make my way to the hot-tub. "Here you go." I smile down at Juicy. He takes the white claw with a soft smile. I climb into the hot-tub sitting on the opposite side of Juicy. "Thank you." He says once I'm in. "No problem." I smile softly. We sit in silence for a bit. This isn't our usually silence though this is a very awkward silence. "I'm sorry." He finally speaks up. I lift my head to look at him. "It's not your fault." I shake my head no as I speak. Juicy looks at me with sad eyes. He sits up straight. "Yes it is. I'm the one Josh is jealous over." He points at himself. "But that's not your fault, I'm the one who went against Josh's wishes." I explain. "It is my fault. Josh wouldn't have to worry about me if I just stayed away from you." He pauses. "But I can't. I try so hard but I just can't stay away from you Y/N." He drops his head. I go to speak but can't come up with words. "I'm sorry." He says again. I watch as he gets out the hot-tub still not able to say anything. He wraps a towel around himself and enters the house leaving me outside alone. The truth is I can't stay away from him either. I tried for a couple hours earlier and it physically hurt me to avoid Juicy. He's my other half, my best friend. I want to be around him all the time.