𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐋𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒; 𝑻.𝑮𝑰𝒀𝑼𝑼 [✓]

x

i don't like this chapter.

but here is my attempt at an apology for the last one :>

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the sand dipped under your feet as cold waves washed onto shore. the sun was slowly peeking over the horizon, turning the night sky into a warm orange. 
 
laughter flowed with the wind, but they did not belong to you. 
 
looking up from the sand, you watched the two children running in front of you. one a girl, the other a boy. they didn't look to be older than five. 
 
whose kids are those?
 
you continued to stare. the girl picking something from the sand before showing it to the boy next to her. taking it from her chubby hands, the boy tossed the object into the water. the girl screamed in protest while he ran away, wobbling side to side, giggling to himself.
 
you squinted, trying to catch a glimpse of their face. but, not once did they turn around, as if hiding their identity from you on purpose.
 
with a sigh, you leaned into the man next to you, your hand intertwined with his.
 
you glanced up at him, expecting to see a familiar face. but when you didn't, you felt yourself involuntarily jerking away.
 
it's not that you didn't recognise him. 
 
his hold on your hand tightened as his features shifted.
 
you stared, wide eyed. 
 
was there something wrong with your eyes?
 
the man next to you had no face.
 
or rather, his features were distorted and blurred beyond recognition.
 
what you assumed is his mouth was moving, but his voice came out all wrong and muffled.
 
you couldn't understand a thing.
 
hesitantly, you placed a hand against the side of his face. 
 
you opened your mouth to speak, but your voice refused to come out.
 
frowning, you squeezed your eyes shut, keeping them closed for a while before opening them again.
 
the man's face started to come into focus. bit by bit, his features came back. little by little, his voice became clearer.
 
"...you ... back... now..?"
 
you shook your head, not understanding.
 
"...[y/n]?"
 
your heart jumped at the sound of your name leaving his lips. you never thought you'd get to hear him say it again.
 
why?
 
taking in a deep breath, you tried to say the words that had been tucked into the back of your mind. out of sight, but never forgotten. 
 
"tomioka-"
 
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"[y/n]!"
 
your eyes snapped open as you sprung up into a sitting position. "what?!"
 
your mother stood at the foot of your bed, arms folded across her chest. "do not make me repeat myself. get up now, or you'll be late for school!" the woman mumbled something under her breath as she left your room.
 
slapping a hand over your face, you dragged it down with a groan. 
 
not wanting to give your mother another chance to yell at you, you unwillingly left the comforts of your bed. 
 
as you got ready for your first day of college, the dream stayed, lingering in your mind.
 
you've been dreaming that same dream for as long as you can remember. there was always two kids and a man with you. the kids never showed their faces to you, and the man's features were always blurred.

every time his face becomes clear, you were only given a split second to take it in before you're forced awake.

and just like that, his face and voice is erased from your memory again.

all you knew was his name.

but even that slips your mind sometimes.

it's strange, really. knowing his name and nothing else.
 
you do, however, know that your dreams took place a long time ago. you recalled your first dream, you were in a house somewhere in the woods, your mother was sick and you had a little brother. oh, and a talking crow? apparently demons existed in your dreams, and so did these people called the demon slayers and the pillars.

though you couldn't remember their names.

it took a while before the mysterious man started showing up in your dreams. 

you spent your days, wide awake, trying your best to figure out who this man is. but you never got past his name. 
 
it was frustrating trying to figure it out. so, you eventually gave up.
 
but no matter how hard you tried to forget, your heart wouldn't let you.

if he was so important, why can't you remember?
 
"i'm heading out now," you called to your mother from the living room, hastily putting on your shoes. 
 
"okay! good luck! and be careful!" she yelled from the kitchen.
 
"bye ayumu." you mess up your five-year-old brother's hair, earning a whine from him. "see you later."
 
shutting the front door behind you, you ran down the street to catch your bus. 
 
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"shinobu!" you were out of breath when you finally found her. "i'm sorry, i got lost."
 
"no worries!" she smiled, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder. "we still have time."
 
you were beyond happy when you found out shinobu was going to the same college and taking the same diploma as you - pharmaceutical medicine. the two of you met in high school and have been friends ever since.
 
it took a good fifteen minutes until you found your classroom. 
 
students from the previous lesson were packing up and leaving as you entered.
 
shinobu had left about a minute ago, asking you to save her a seat as she rushed to the restroom.
 
you glanced around the huge room, contemplating on where to sit.
 
and that's when you saw him. the man from your dreams.
 
impossible. you blinked at the boy. 
 
but the longer you looked, the more he resembled the man. maybe a younger version of him.
 
you felt the sudden urge to call for him. 
 
what was his name, again?
 
your mind was in a mess as you searched for his name. in your eighteen years of being alive, not once have you heard it.
 
remember. remember. what is it?
 
you swear you know it. knew it. read it before. wrote it before. heard it before. said it before.

yes, but it all happened in my dreams, not in real life. how could i possibly remember-
 
"uhm. excuse me." a voice pulled you out of your thoughts as you looked up at the boy in front of you. "you're in my way."
 
"oh-" you quickly stepped aside. "i'm sorry!"
 
but the boy had already walked past you, out of earshot. 
 
waiting outside of the classroom was his friend. a boy with light pink hair, resting just above his shoulders. his eyes were a dull lavender, and he had a distinct scar on his right cheek. 
 
your hands balled into fists as frustration settles in your chest. 
 
why can't i remember his name? 
 
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"bye! see you tomorrow!" 
 
you and shinobu parted ways as you made your way to the bus stop.
 
switching on your phone, you checked for the bus arrival time.
 
six minutes.
 
you dragged your finger down from the top of the screen, checking your notifications. 
 
as you scrolled through your messages and watched the videos your friends had sent you, someone joined you at the bus stop, stopping a few feet away from you.
 
out of curiosity, you turned to the side to look at the stranger.
 
the boy next to you was no stranger.
 
or maybe he was. 
 
you couldn't take your eyes off him.
 
who are you?
 
much to your dismay, the boy looks up, his dark blue eyes meeting yours.
 
his eyebrows knitted together. "what?"
 
"s-sorry..." you quickly averted your gaze, unwanted heat rushing to your face.
 
thankfully, your bus arrives before the silence could become awkward.
 
the boy next to you got on the bus as well. 
 
you silently cursed.
 
then you cursed again when there was only one seat left, and it was next to him.
 
your bag was too heavy, and you were too exhausted to not sit down. 
 
reluctantly, you slid into the seat next to him, making sure to leave a small gap between.
 
not knowing what to do, you went back on your phone. mindlessly scrolling.
 
your skin prickled under his gaze. you tried your best to keep your eyes on your phone. however, you were running out of things to do on it.
 
lifting your head up, you turned to your side. sure enough, the boy next to you was staring.
 
he didn't look away. now the two of you were just staring at each other in silence.
 
this is so awkward, holy shit. 
 
you decided to return to your phone.
 
the bus made another stop, allowing people to get off.
 
you noticed two empty seats in front of you. 
 
shall i change my seat? 
 
not wasting another second, you stood up and made a start for the available seat.
 
"hey." 
 
you turn to the voice behind you. the boy was looking at you, his hand held outwards, your earpiece in his grasp. it must've fallen out when you retrieved your phone.
 
"oh." with an embarrassed smile, you picked it up from his hand, stuffing it back into your pocket. "thank you."
 
when you started to make your way to a different seat again, you realised you were too late as the seats had already been taken.
 
fuck.
 
silently, avoiding eye contact, you sat back down next to the boy. you hugged your bag tighter against your chest, your heart racing.
 
the silence was unbearable. you felt yourself getting more anxious as the bus got emptier until it was only the two of you and an old couple.
 
...
 
"hi." you immediately regretted speaking. "sorry for bothering you," you continued. because wouldn't it be more awkward if you stayed silent? "have we... met before?"
 
"yes." the boy answered, his face expressionless. "you were blocking my way in the classroom."
 
"t-that's not what i meant!" you felt the sudden need to defend yourself. "i mean, before that."
 
"no."
 
"oh. okay." you nervously played with the straps from your bag. "sorry, you just looked familiar."
 
the boy gave you a nod before facing the front. 
 
the silence was suffocating. 
 
"so..." you continued. "what's your name?" 
 
your chest was starting to hurt with how hard your heart was thumping against it. 
 
"why?"
 
"well, since we go to the same school..." you shrugged, trying to hide your nervousness. "maybe we can be friends?"
 
the boy gave you a blank look. five seconds passed. ten. fifteen. twenty.
 
i shouldn't have asked. 
 
you'd be lying if you said you weren't upset.
 
you wanted to know his name. needed to.
 
you opened your mouth to apologise but he spoke first.
 
"tomioka giyuu."
 
you shut your mouth, pressing your lips into a tight line.
 
that's it.
 
that was his name.
 
you felt yourself getting excited as you finally remembered. 
 
this boy had the same name as the man you dreamed of.
 
your mind calmed down, finally finding the missing information it had been looking for. his name.
 
you did know it.
 
"tomioka... giyuu..." you mumbled. it sounded so right. 
 
you smiled as you repeated his name over and over again in your mind. making sure to never forget it.
 
"i'm [l/n]-"
 
"[y/n]." a soft smile spreads across his features. "right?"
 
it seems like you weren't the only one who remembered.