A fate worse than death~~A Finnick Odair story~~

29. Punished

You know sometimes when things just go well, you're happy for no reason and life just aches easily. It was something Elizabeth Whitmore hadn't experienced in a long time, but these past few months had been amazing. She was so happy that even the people at the bakery noticed the change. She saw her brother more often, Ian slept over almost every weekend and she helped him with his homework in the evening, her conversations with Melinda could have gone from hard, tough and serious topics to happy bedfellows and gossip. But best of all was her blossoming relationship with Finnick. They hung out more than ever and had gone on more dates together than Elizabeth had gone on in her entire life, which in hindsight might not have been that hard, but the highlight of all her days was when she stopped at the bakery, when she brought the breads and pastries that had blown over and she walked, hand in hand, with Finnick all the way home. He even helped her hand out the goods.

Yes Elizabeth was indeed on a high, nothing could spoil her happy mood, not even the current victory tour, nor the upcoming visit to the capital.

At least that's what she thought.

Because, you see, the capital is really a dark place, and the president, woooow that old man can't handle when anyone else is happy, and that's exactly what young Miss Whitmore had become, happy.

This annoyed him, or maybe it interested him, I guess we'll never know, but in any case the whole world may know that on that day, a Thursday, President Snow called Miss Whitmore into his office. The meeting took place behind closed doors, and what was said we may never know.

"I have a proposition for you."
She didn't answer, didn't mean to answer, didn't ask. If he had expected her to fall into the same old trap, he was wrong.
"It could meen the end of all youre dates."
He enticed, wanting her to ask, not intending to reveal, but did she really dare to ask?

"You mean the dates when my company was paid for in drinks."
She made it sound like a question, but it wasn't a question. Just a small part of her needed to get him to admit before she agreed or no, she wanted to hear him say it.
"This new deal would mean the end of all future dates, yes."
Not really an admission, but Elizabeth got the feeling she wasn't going to get any closer.

"So what does this new…Proposal mean."
"Ahh, so glad you asked."
He plastered on a smile, Elizabeth knew it was fake, she did the same thing before every interview but be damned if she was to pointed it out. "Yes, this new, proposal would mean the end of all dates, a little more time to enjoy the capital and you'd only have to meet one other persion apart from your stylist, a once in a lifetime offer realy."
"What's the catch?"
His smile  failed, just for a second, just a little.
"Dear Miss Whitmore, there is no catch."
"There's always a catch."
At least when it comes to you.

"The catch is that I'm going to let you meet Mister Odare."
A tiny twitch in my face, barely noticeable.
Did he know?
He couldn't know, could he?
Sure we hadn't been outright secretive, but we'd never done anything outside our four walls to hint, and NEVER in the capital!

"Hahah I'm kidding!!"
"Very funny."
"You would have to make it look like, you were particularly interested in a certain persion."
"Interested?"
"Shall we say in love."

"No."
"No?"
"I won't, not a chance."
"Mind the matter, it wouldn't start until your next visit."
"No! Are you deaf? I say no! And count me out of any future dates you have planned too, I'm done being a pawn in your sick game!"
"Miss Whitmore.."
"No!!"
"There will be consequences if you behave like this."
"Like what, are you going to send me into the games?! Oh no wait, you already did!!"
"Consequences Miss Whitmore."
"Try me."
"As you wish."

I didn't even wait for him to let me go, I just got up and left. Never in my life had I felt so powerful.

~~~

Never in my life had I felt so powerless.

We had followed the flow of people when we get off the train. The stream of sun led to a burning house. My burning house. I stood there completely paralyzed. It was as if I saw all the events outside my own body, this was not my house, it was not my mother they came carrying, it was someone else's, as if it happened in a movie. The only thing that brought me back to reality was a heart wrenching scream, a scream that came from Ian when he saw the charred remains that were, or rader should have been our mother.

I can honestly say that in retrospect I remember the evening like in a fog. I know we came from the capital, I know some carried my mother out, I know Ian was there, but that was about it. Maybe it's because Mags, Finnick and Annie quickly got us out of there. They realized the futility of standing and watching a burning house that could not be saved until I did it myself, but then why should I remember the coming events so clearly?

I know Ian and I stepped into my entry and took off our shoes, if someone asked I could even tell you in detail what order the shoes were in and what jackets were hanging where.

I know we rinsed off, Ian with a vanilla soap and I with a fruty one. I clearly remember tucking him into my bed and promising to be back soon.

But what I remember most clearly is the little note lying on the desk in the office, I actually don't know why I went to the office, but on the note it says, word for word.
"All mistakes must be punished."

And after that I wasted no time.

That same night I sent a message to the president, it was very formal.

"I agree to all the conditions,
every catch. There will be no more mistakes.
Miss Whitmore."

Never in my life have I written so few words that simultaneously meant so much.

For my eyes only,
and your pages.
Only now do I realize that my entire world can be demolished with no more effort from the president than a breath.

This world is cruel, but for Ian I will do anything. He shouldn't have to see what I've seen, experience what I've experienced, then I'd rather die.