My Big Fat Spy Marriage

Fifteen

AN: 16 years ago (Age 10)

I dreamt about that night again. I haven't had that nightmare since I was 8. I spent two years trying to forget it all. Do what my mentor says and be an island. I have finally mastered that skill. Or so I thought. Now I'm reliving the worst day of my life.

It's been 4 years but I still remember it clearly. The night my parents were murdered was the last time I ever felt true fear. A talented Rex agent also lost their life that night. It was the night I learned that attachments are risky and can kill you. Most importantly I learned not to rely on others.

That's why I've got no friends. And why I don't really enjoy working with partners. If I have to, I prefer to take the lead and give them a supporting role. I really don't like relying on others. My mentor tells me I need to work on that. He agrees attachments are a waste, but still thinks teamwork is important. I agree having agents from different sectors is great, but being in the field with other people just slows me down. That's been the case since I started training in the orphan program. 

"Fiona! Your chores will need to be redone. The yard is a mess and the kitchen floors are still dirty." My mentor calls out.

I've got weekly chores to do but I rushed through them before school this morning. I was sloppy and it won't happen again.

"Yes sir!"

When I finish with my work for the day, I come back in for water and a snack. He's made dinner and left a place setting out so I sit to eat. He must have ate before I got here. We rarely if ever eat at the same time unless he has suggestions and critiques for my fighting technique.

I don't mind because I've really grown to enjoy being alone. I like the quiet and being able to get lost in my thoughts. For example, he made spaghetti and meatballs tonight. It's currently my favorite dish because I like anything with pasta. Since I'm alone, I can enjoy my meal in silence and think about the book I plan to read tonight.

-*-

AN: Present Day

Content Warning: There will be BDSM depicted in this chapter and in this book going forward

Fiona

"You want to what?" Sebastian asks.

"Handcuff you to your chair." I state.

"Ok but why?" He questions further.

"I'm a switch, but am usually much more dominant. In fact, you're the first vanilla guy I've been with." I explain. His eyes widen and he takes a seat by me on the bed.

"Am I seriously the first white guy you've slept with?"

"No you idiot. Vanilla as in someone who doesn't incorporate kink into their sex life."

"Ohhhh....I knew that."

"Mmhhm. Look do you want to try it or not? We don't have to if you're not comfortable with that."

"Do I have to wear blindfolded too?"

"Not right away, that can be intimidating for new-."