I LAID ON MY BACK a joint in my mouth as i looked at the picture of me and nessa. i dont like to smoke but im stressed. why cant she just be mine. after i took her home (she still hasn't kissed me yet), that thought ran through my mind. it ran through my dreams, she's doing graffiti in my fucking head.
nessa: what the actual fuck are these photos?
billie: of you at the party?
nessa: no shit smart ass. i look crazy.
billie: ur not crazy
nessa: thank you bil bil
nessa: wanna go to the movies?
billie: dont u have work?
nessa: yeah but after bil
nessa: you okay?
billie: im fine
billie: sure ill see you later
nessa: okay bil
i got up and went to work with fineas. i love doing interviews, they just make me a little tired. "just tell me who she is!" he exclaimed, "she's nobody! literally. she doesn't- she doesn't even like me like that." i looked out the window. why doesnt she fucking like me. ill stop whatever im doing wrong, she must hate it when i touch her then, i wont touch her anymore.
i entered her job, and of course i had to see some fans before actually getting to nessa. we left together, i dont know when phototagaphers got here, but they're here. i sped off, nessa amazed by the entire scene.
"that's so scary!! are you good?"
i nodded, "im fine." she sucked her teeth, "i dont want you to get bombarded in the movies. oo! look!" she reached in her bag and pulled out a ski mask. i laughed, "where the actual fuck did you get this from?" i asked, "i dont even remember, but it's clean. they wont know who you are."
i put it on and she took a picture, "you actually look really fucking hot."
we went to the movie and cuddled up while we watched it. she's so good at fake loving me that it makes me forget about how badly she treated me before. we took pictures, and she held me. i ended up falling asleep, and only woke up to clap at the end.
jasgosti0
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jagosti0 my favorite eyes liked by 100,000 others
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i woke up to this in the middle of the night. my phone is fucking blowing up. my phone wasn't on silent, and it woke janesa up.
"it's not that big of a deal."
"it looks like we're.. dating. so yeah, it is a big deal. people are going to be writting about it in the morning.. and i dont know if we're dating. isn't that kinda a big deal?"
"no."
"well it is to me."
she got up and turned on the lights, hurting my eyes. "fuck" the light hurt my eyes. she put my hoodie on, then her shoes then left, and i was too tired to chase her.
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JPOV
sarahkeegan you stop talking to me for months, then pop up with billie eilish?
jagosti0 what
sharakeegan you were my bestfriend
jagosti0 what
sharahkeegan wdym what?
jagosti0 we were never friends!
i've been getting text messages like these all day. guess billie has never clarifed that she's gay. she just is, it's none of their damn business, but they're all in it, trying to fucking figure out who i am. i went from 2,300 followers, to 20k in one night.
kasen: so what's going on? you famous now?
kasen: you're such a selfish bitch
messages like these are making me cry. why the fuck did he change so fucking fast, slow down.
janesa: when can i see you?
billie: soon
she's in london, fucking avoiding me... no she's just working. she's the only fucker im really responding too. my dad is fine, he listened. ive been working, anxious everywhere i go. why the fuck are modeling agencies calling me?
janesa: i miss you
billie: i miss you too
janesa: have you been sleeping?
billie: not really
janesa: im sorry. i wish i was there.
billie: why?
janesa: i miss you
billie: alright
janesa: did you stretch today? dont hurt your leg again
billie: yeah i did
janesa: dont lie
billie: i didn't
janesa: billie do you think that i fucking hate you?
