Last Spark Of Hope

Chapter 1

*1 years later*

{Reid's POV}

A lot has happened in the past year and a half. Hotch went into the military, Beth is pregnant, Emily had her baby, Sandy moved in, my dad died. And JJ died with Meg. "Spencer?" I hear "Yeah." I say wiping my face "I'm going to take the kids to the park is that ok?" Sandy asked "Yeah." I say "Bye kids. Be good." "Bye daddy." Mason says as they hug me "Bye." I say as they leave. I let out a deep breath when they leave. I hate the kids having to see me like this. I head to the bathroom to take a shower and look at myself in the mirror. My eyes have even darker bags under them the usual. My hair is a mess. I lift up my shirt and immediately close my eyes. The only time I'm eating is when Sandy literally forces me to or when the kids are around. I turn on the music before getting in the shower and of corse, Battle Scars come on. 'The wound heels but it never does, that's cause you're at war with love.' "You can say that again." I say as I wash my hair 'I wish I never looked, I wish I never touched. I wish that I could stop loving you so much, cause I'm the only one that's trying to keep us together when all of the signs say that I should forget her.' "Easier said then done my friend." I say as I get out. "It shouldn't have happened but you let it. Now you're down on the ground screaming medic. The only thing that comes is the post-traumatic stresses Shields, body armors and vests don't properly work, that's why you're in a locker full of hurt. The enemy within and all the fires from your friend. The best medicine is to probably just let her win' "The best medicine." I say thinking as I bite my lip. Sandy's here with the kids. She can take care of them for a few days. I'm sure she won't need me. She won't know I'm gone. After all it will help the cravings and nightmare stop. I could finally get some rest. I know what I have to do.

{Sandy's POV}

I know it's been hard on Spencer losing JJ but it's been hard on everyone else too. The kids are having a hard time understanding where their mother and little sister 'went to'. Honestly I'm worried about Spencer. He's not eating, he's not sleeping, when he does sleep he has nightmares and starts screaming stuff about JJ. Jennifer told me about his drug addiction and getting over it and how his cravings would get bad every now and then, and I honestly think that's what going on. "Is daddy gonna die too?" Henry asked catching me off "No honey why do you think that?" I asked "Because he doesn't leave his room. Last night I heard him crying again and he kept screaming mommy's name." Henry says "No buddy it's- it's hard to explain." I say "I really hope he'll be ok." Henry says "Me too buddy." I say "Me too."