The Religious & The Damaged (UNDER EDITING)

44

One week later...

Joseph

I walk out of the church and press my back against the brick wall because I feel lightheaded, and I'm also waiting for Kelsey to come out, so I can make sure she's okay.
I haven't really talked to her since she dragged me to the party, and even then, we didn't really talk much because she disappeared like immediately, and she looked upset during the service.
I wait for half an hour before I realize she's not coming out. I peer into the church and I don't see her. She must've left through a different door, but just in case, I walk back in and into the hall leading to the bathrooms.
"Kel?" I call out, and I make sure to be quiet as to not alarm anyone.
I walk past the bathrooms but stop at the sudden sound of muffled crying. I tense and turn. I step forward and lift a reluctant hand to the door to knock, and I lean the side of my face to the door as I call out again.
"Kel? Is that you?"
No response. I gulp hard as I step back, and my gaze shifts from side to side to make sure no one's around before I walk into the girls bathroom. Immediately, my eyes land on Kelsey as she stands in front of the mirror—her back to me. I walk over and place a hand on her back.
"Hey, are you-"
She moves from my touch and turns to face me, but her gaze is directed down. "Please..." Desperation and despair is heavy in her voice, and my brows furrow upward as worry settles in, and the fact that just that reaction seems too familiar.
I take a respectful step back. "Okay." I comply, my voice gentle.
She sniffles, her shaky hand reaching to wipe her nose and she blinks at me, tears streaming down her face. I don't speak. I wait for her to talk to me instead. She chokes out a sob before falling against my chest, and I wrap my arms around her—my cheek against her head and my grasp tightens at the sound of her sobs. I feel the dampness of my shirt start to form, but I don't care. I just hold her.
"I can't take it anymore." She cries out, and my heart feels heavy at her words. "He just won't stop.." My body tenses, and I'm sure she feels it. "I can't take it anymore." She repeats.
"You can tell me..." I reassure her, worry heavy in my voice. "I'm here, Kel."
A muffled sob escapes her before she speaks again. She says, "He.." Another sob comes. "It wasn't bad before, but these last few months have been-" She cries. "I can't.. I can't say it..."
I lean back, a shaky breath slipping from my lips as my gaze meets hers; my hands on each of her arms as I become engrossed in the rush of anger and disgust that runs through me, and what follows is memories of my own experience in what I think is happening.
"Does he.." My eyes shut tight, and my disgust intensifies as the word slips from my lips. "Rape you?" I ask.
She seemingly sobs more at the mention, and it only makes the answer more apparent. My gaze lifts, and she's speaking to me, but I don't hear her over my own burning hot rage—I'm blinded by it.
I brush the hair that sticks to her tears, out of her face as I say, "It's okay. It's okay." Her eyes meet my tainted ones. "Stay here."
"What?"
"Just stay here."
I turn and leave the bathroom, and Kelsey's voice follows behind me.
"No. Joseph. Joseph, stop."
She attempts to grab me, but I continue to storm my way back to the front of the church, and I see her father. She continues to make an effort to stop me, but I don't. In one swift moment, I tug him around and punch him across the face and he stumbles back.
"Joseph!" Kelsey's voice breaks.
I pull him back in front of me and punch him again and again, and I'm spitting out words I can't remember over my rage. I hear as panicked members of the church try to get me to stop. I don't. I shove him back and he trips over a bench, and he's on the floor.
I'm surprised I even have the strength to act as I do because just a minute ago, I could barely walk before having to take a break against the wall because I might've passed out from how weak I am, but I just conclude it as adrenaline rush.
I go to punch him again, but a set of hands tug my arms behind my back and pull me from Kelsey's father swiftly.
"Have you lost your mind?" My father speaks, his voice strained and full of anger, and I feel as the adrenaline disintegrates in mere seconds as he tugs me out of the church by my arm and shoves me into the car.

I fall against the floor of my father's room when he shoves me down. And when he speaks, his voice is heavy with anger.
"You have completely embarrassed me." He tugs me up onto my knees in front of the altar. "I'm growing very tired of you. You're nothing but a burden and a disappointment in my life." His belt comes into contact with my back and I wince. "I've about had it with you. I have right the mind to bring you back to that skank and let her have her way with you." My eyes shut tight as the memories flood through my brain, and his whips grow harsher.
I can't breathe. I'm choking on my tears as I fight the urge to get up and run to the bathroom and throw up or to my room to slit my wrists—I'm losing the battle. I don't want to live. His words cut deeper than a knife. I feel like I'm suffocating in the words he speaks and the memories that fill my head, and they spin and spin like a tornado. I can't stop it. I don't know how. Maybe, I don't want to stop it. I deserve it.

I stumble out of the bathroom, my trembling hand reaching to wipe my mouth as I ascend the hall to my bedroom and I walk in. I trip over my own feet and drop to the floor, a heavy wince leaving my lips, and I don't get up—I just scoot back against the bed frame, my knees to my chest as I stare at the wall in front of me.
Don't do it. Don't do it.
My eyes shut tight, and I reach behind me to take the shears from underneath my pillow, but the sound of my window opening stops me, and I look over. Kelsey steps onto my desk, then her feet touch the floor as a sigh leaves her lips, and she turns to me. Her eyes widen.
"Holy shit. Joseph, he's going to fucking kill you."
"I'm fine."
She kneels in front of me, her hands to my face, but she doesn't touch me because she knows it'll hurt. Her brows furrow upward, and her expression of concern turns soft as she leans back into a sitting position.
"You're not fine." She states. I turn my gaze elsewhere. "You didn't have to do that."
"Yeah. I did." I say, my voice low.
"What are you talking about?"
I huff. "I couldn't just walk away from that, and he shouldn't get away with doing that, no way in hell was I gonna let that slide. His actions have fucking consequences, and they don't go away no matter how much-" She snorts out a laugh. I look at her. "What?"
She shrugs, a slight grin on her face. "I just never thought I'd hear you cuss. Kinda feels weird, it doesn't fit."
My gaze flickers back down.
Did I? I didn't even notice. A bad taste lingers in my mouth, so I guess I did. I guess, I just feel strongly about the matter.
My trance is broken when she pushes the hair from my face, and I look up. A smile tugs at her lips as she speaks.
She says, "Thank you..."
She pushes between my legs to wrap her arms around my neck and lay her head against my chest. I gulp hard as I let myself sink in the comfort of her hold—her body pressing against mine.
"I'll always protect you." I say, and it's muffled against her shoulder, but I know she still hears it because her grasp tightens.
"I know." She says, then it's silent; it's a comforting silence. "Why are you ignoring Elias?" She asks after a long time, and she leans back to look at me.
I look down. "My father threatened that if I keep seeing him that he'll hurt him." I tell her. "He's the reason my mom's gone."
"Oh my god." I just nod. "Wait, so he killed her?"
I nod again, and strained, shaky breaths slip from my nose as I try to keep myself together because I feel as tears fill my eyes and my brows tremble as I struggle to keep the cries in and the memories at bay.
"Joseph, did he do something to you?" She asks, hesitation heavy in her voice, and then that's it—I break down.