Them. | The Final Installment of the Him Series | Joe Jonas Fanfiction

Forty Four.

"Hey baby."

I blink, looking over. "Hi."

"Are you okay?" he asks, walking over, a concerned look on his face.

"Yeah," I nod. "Yeah."

"What happened?" he asks, placing a hand on my waist while the other gently hold my hand. "I thought it was going to go well."

"It did," I blink, nodding. "Yeah, it did."

He furrows his brows. "Then..."

I gulp, licking my lips. "I'm pregnant."

He blinks, grinning before letting out a confused breath, his brows furrowing as he takes a step back. "Wait, why aren't you happy? I thought this is what we wanted. We-"

"No, I am," I say, grabbing his hand. "I am. I'm just also like..."

He furrows his brows further, clearly getting upset.

"Please don't be upset. I'm just, I'm worried."

"You're worried?" he asks, confused. "About what?"

"I'm worried that..." I sigh. "I still feel like this isn't all over and I-"

Joe sighs, closing his eyes and shaking his head, clearly frustrated with me.

"No, don't do that. I just-"

"Addie, baby, you have to move on from this. You found him. You saved us. We are all safe now," he stresses. "We're okay now."

I sigh, running a hand through my hair. "That's not how I feel! I don't feel like it's over! I-"

"You don't feel like it's over because you won't let it be over," he argues, taking another step back. "You won't let it just be. You keep going back to it and I don't know why. I don't understand why you can't just let it go."

"Joe-"

"You're home now, Addie. You're home. The girls are happy, their separation anxiety is getting so much better. Your head injury is healing, I have a single coming out tomorrow. We're all doing so good, but you won't move forward, you're living in those six months where nothing was right!"

"Because-"

"Because what, Addie? Please," he says, desperate, his eyes begging. "Please, tell me, baby. I'm at a loss, I don't know what to do anymore to bring you back to me. I thought we were doing good. I thought you were starting to move on!"

"I can't!"

"Why not?!"

"Because I feel it," I tell him, my eyes welling up with tears. "I know that it isn't over. I feel it in my bones, Joe. I know that it isn't over. I know that it sounds crazy and everyone, literally everyone that I have tried to talk to about it says that I'm just paranoid and losing it and going crazy but I'm not fucking crazy. I lived that life for twenty-one years and I am telling you, I'm trying to tell all of you something's not right. Something is wrong! It doesn't feel finished. I don't feel like I fixed anything. I feel like the other shoe is about to fucking drop and I'm going to lose everything!" I exclaim, finally breaking down, allowing the tears to begin to fall.

Joe's face stays locked, brows furrowed, still angry with me.

"I want this baby so fucking bad, Joe. You don't understand how badly I wish I could stand in front of you right now and smile and celebrate because we're going to have another baby. I have wanted this and I know we've been trying, and I was excited to try and to be pregnant and then they said the words and all I could do was freeze because all I can keep thinking about is the fact that somehow the shoe is going to drop once this baby is here and I am so scared..." I shake my head. "No, I am fucking terrified that I'm going to have to leave again or you or one of the girls or this baby is going to get hurt and it'll all be because of me, and I don't know how to stop worrying about it! You and our kids are my entire fucking life and if anything happened to one of you..." I close my eyes, shaking my head as another sob chokes from my chest. "I would fucking die. I would rather fucking die than have to do anything like that again. Than have to live without you and the kids. I know it's not over; I feel it in my bones. I-I-I feel it in my- in my-"