☠︎︎ 53. Never Again ☠︎︎

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— he is the only miracle I ever saw

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— he is the only miracle I ever saw

he is my miracle for now and for more

for better or for worse

I will always hold him close —

TWO WEEKS LATER

"I can't anymore, grandma. I just can't! I have to go back," Chay groaned, plopping down on a chair in the kitchen. He had been back at his grandmother's house for a week, gaining strength and trying his best to get better as fast as possible. He had been barely sleeping at night. Even though sleep was one of the things he needed the most to recover faster. But he just couldn't stop thinking about Kim. He kept twisting the ring that Kim gave him. Glancing at it every couple of seconds just to make sure that it was still there.

Kim was so close to him, yet so far away.

What was he doing? How was he doing? That look in Kim's eyes when he saw Chay getting stabbed... it kept haunting Chay's dreams. He had to go back. He had to make sure that Kim was all right. That he didn't try to do anything stupid. That he was there safe and sound, waiting for Chay to come back to him.

It was driving him crazy that he wasn't with Kim, that his body was too fucking weak to time travel. He was honestly feeling strong now. He could go. He was just wasting time here!

At least that's how he felt. And he hated himself for it. His grandmother was clear after all. This was the last time they saw each other. And yet, Chay's entire body and soul screamed to get back to Kim already.

Chay shook his head, "I'm sorry, grandma... I don't want to make you feel like I want to leave you. I—"

"You have to go back, Porchay. I understand. I knew this day would come one day. I knew it way before you did, remember?" Chay's grandmother smiled like she was at peace with everything that was happening, and squeezed Chay's shoulder. "But before you go, have some chocolate waffles with vanilla ice cream and strawberries. One of your favourites, hmm?" She put a plate in front of Chay and caressed his hair.

Chay looked dumbfounded at the plate and then back at his grandmother, "does that mean that you are letting me go today?"

"I think that you are recovered enough to handle it now. I knew that if you could you'd be gone a long time ago."

"But... grandma... is this really the last time we see each other? Is there really no way—"

"There isn't, sweetheart. You have to go back to Kim, and I have to go too... I'll be looking out for you from the other side. Have the most wonderful and fulfilled life, Porchay."

"I promise I will," Chay replied, trying to keep his tears away. He pulled out the Ruby Red from his pocket and looked at it. "Grandma..."

"Yes, sweetheart?"

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