The Public Stunt

Episode 18: Please?

I continued crying.

I continued sobbing.

Ang sakit lang. Ang sakit nung ideya na sobra agad akong nahusgahan ng ibang tao nang hindi pa naman nila nalalaman kung ano ang totoo. No one even clarified if what Hope said is the whole truth. They just left me here. Defenseless. Hindi man lang ako nabigyan ng chance para ipaliwanag na puro kasanungalingan lang lahat ng sinabi ni Hope.

"Hey..." Jarren said as he continued hugging me.

"I wanna go home," I responded while still crying.

"Alright," Jarren stood up and about to help me get up, "I will get you home-"

But I cut him off, "just leave me alone, Jarren. Please. Just let me be alone."

It was obvious by how his mouth went agape that he was caught off-guard by what I just said. But what can I do? Gusto kong mapag-isa. Ayoko nang may kasama. Gusto ko, ako lang.

He slowly nodded his head, "are you sure?"

I just nodded my head.

'Di ko na talaga siya tiningnan pa hanggang sa lumabas na siya sa kwarto. Hanggang sa naiwan na naman ako dito sa dressing room nang mag-isa. And I know it was rude. I was rude. I should not be diverting my frustration on him. And most especially, I must not do something like that to a person I like. Pero 'di ko lang talaga mapigilan. He is connected to Hope. At this moment, I don't want to be with someone who is connected to that bitch, and yes, even if it's Jarren.

Lalo akong umiyak sa pagtagal ng mga minuto, mabuti na lang talaga at bumalik iyong make-up artist ko. He was the one who helped me with everything. I wanna exit the event as fast as I can. Mabuti na lang talaga at tinulungan niya ako hanggang sa makasakay na ako sa taxi.

When I got home, all I did was to cry the hell out.

I received myriads of calls from Jarren and Mama Cece, but I left them all unanswered. Jarren even pings my doorbell a couple of times, but I don't have the energy to face him, nor anyone. Gusto ko lang talagang mapag-isa.

And just like how I wanted, I was alone up until I fell asleep.

The next morning was the worst.

I was bombarded with Mama Cece's messages including all the links of blind item about me. Lahat, masakit. Lahat, nakakasira ng bait. Sobrang sinira ng mga showbiz journalists doon ang pagkatao ko.

Namalayan ko na lang na one moment after, I am now the villain.

Pero ang masakit? I am still defenseless. 'Di ko mapagtanggol ang sarili ko because responding means I am affected. And if I show a hint that I am affected, they will attack me more. Just like how I was trained by Mama Cece, I remained silent. They can't reveal that it was me, and it will continue to float as a pure rumor because they cannot confirm it as it will cause them some legal punishment from my team.

So I chose to just shut my mouth. To just let people speculate.

I can't ruin my career now.

Nag-start na akong makuha lahat ng pinapangarap ko. I am on the verge of success. I cannot waste this once in a lifetime opportunity.

"Bwisit na mukha 'yan, mukha pa ba 'yan?" Ang sambit ni Luhan nang makapasok na siya sa condo unit ko kasama ang tatlong eagirl ko. They were worried. Ilang araw akong 'di nag-reply sa kahit na kanino except for Mama Cece.

"Mukha kang stress na tinubuan ng mukha ng tao," Luhan pushed more, and I hit him in the arms.

"Aray naman!"