Divine's Time

42. get it together

Divine

I was tired, today took everything out of me. Physically and emotionally.

I still feel as though we had a beautiful baby shower when it came to support and love. But man, the drama it came with was overwhelming. Time and I helped Mama clean up the Airbnb in silence. We gave each other a couple of glances, but I let her think instead of attacking her with my pleads for forgiveness. 

I swear, every time I feel like we getting somewhere in our relationship something sets us back.

This time, I knew I hadn't done anything wrong so I was okay with just leaving her be for now. Not because I didn't want her to believe me but because I wanted her to listen to her gut, whatever her gut says is what I want her to follow. 

 After cleaning up the house, all I wanted to do was shower and lay down. I decided to stay here for the night because I didn't have the energy to drive 30 minutes back to my apartment. I opened the door to the room Time and I had been in earlier when Tron busted in. I don't know why I was surprised to see Fran passed out drunk on the bed. Half her body was off the bed, and the other half was stretched out. 

Of course, she was holding on to a wine cooler. 

I shook my head in disappointment. I never agreed with how she went about things in the past but I never viewed her as this irresponsible. I wanted to wake her ass up and scold her about her recklessness, irresponsibleness, and flat-out messy ass ways.

But I was too tired

I closed the door, shaking my head, and walked down the hall to another random room. Opening the door, I saw Time wrapped up in a towel, with shower water running in the adjacent bathroom. She turned her head quickly and let out a small breath of relief when she saw me at the door.

Her makeup was off, and her hair was tied in a claw clip. I admired her natural beauty as she sat on the edge of the bed, pulling out a bag full of bathing items. 

"You about to get in the shower?" I asked, stating the obvious. I couldn't help but notice how beautiful she was.

She nodded, pulling out a bottle of Dove body wash and a bar of soap out of the bag.

"Can I join you?" I asked. I clenched my hands anticipating her response, knowing I was pushing my luck.

She looked up at me and blinked a few times before she said, "Sure." lowly.

I walked into the bathroom and started to unbutton my Armani button-down shirt in the mirror. I looked at my reflection as I slid off the shirt and started to take the belt off my pants. Time walked in and dropped her white towel showcasing her smooth dark brown body.

 I looked at her through the mirror and was in awe of what her body had turned to since being pregnant.

Her belly bump was perfectly round, making me gain so much appreciation for carrying my children. I know it can't be easy housing two babies as they make all kinds of crazy changes to your body. The wear on her abdomen, lower back, and ankles must be a pain to deal with. But she was doing it so effortlessly. 

Like she was made for this.

It was amazing to witness. She was amazing. Undoubtedly.

I hadn't seen her naked in a long time, it was a privilege to see her like this again. She slid back the glass shower door and stepped in letting the hot water run down her body. I took off my socks eager to get in with her.

Not to do anything sexual, but just to simply be in her presence. I was shocked she was still letting me in after how hurt she was earlier. I wondered if part of her believed me when I was pleading my case to her about Miracle.