perfect actors|| hyunlix ❀

chapter 45

The words wouldn't leave my head.

"Felix, why don't you just tell him the truth?"

They echoed in my mind like a haunting trauma, slipping into every thought, every breath. I had left the café without turning back, my chest tight, my footsteps heavier than they should have been.

What truth?

What was Felix hiding?

I decided to ignore the truth by being buried in works. I hadn't been able to focus on my work but maybe, I can try today and erase everything else in my mind.

those echoes,

those thoughts,

the sound of my heart breaking into pieces. 

that worked but not for too long so I decided to go to our home. But, it felt like 'our' had slowly turned bitter now though, it did make me wonder, how do sweets even turn bitter in such a short time?

I gripped the steering wheel too tightly as I drove, my knuckles white. The city lights blurred past me, but I barely registered them. My thoughts were moving too fast, tangled in endless possibilities, none of them making sense.

Had I done something wrong?

No, Felix wouldn't just shut me out because of that. He would've snapped, argued, and made some sarcastic comments. But this? This wasn't like him.

I exhaled sharply, running a hand through my hair as I pulled up to our apartment building. My heart was pounding in my chest, a steady, heavy beat that didn't match my breaths.

I didn't want to go inside.

Because I knew Felix would be there, and I wasn't sure if I could keep pretending like I wasn't questioning everything we had been through.

Still, I forced myself to step out of the car, my body moving on instinct. The moment I entered the apartment, the air felt heavier.

Felix was in the kitchen, standing by the counter with a glass of water in his hand. He looked up when I walked in, his expression unreadable, his body tense—like he had been waiting for me.

For a second, we just stood there, the silence stretching between us.

Then I spoke.

"You're hiding something."

Felix's fingers tightened around his glass, but he didn't say anything.

I took a step closer. "I heard Yuri." My voice was quieter this time, but the weight behind it remained. "What truth, Felix?"

His lips parted like he wanted to say something—anything—but then he just sighed, setting his glass down with deliberate slowness.

"You're overthinking," he said simply, turning away.

That set something off in me.

"I'm not overthinking." My voice came out sharper than I intended, but I couldn't stop myself. "You've been pulling away for some reason and you won't tell me why. You won't even look at me properly."

Felix hesitated for just a second before forcing out a laugh, one that didn't reach his eyes. "Maybe I just need space."

I clenched my jaw, my patience wearing thin. "From me?"

Felix didn't answer.

And that silence was worse than anything he could have said.

I swallowed hard, my chest tightening. "Felix..." My voice was quieter now, almost pleading. "Just tell me what's wrong."

He finally met my gaze, and for the first time in weeks, I saw something raw in his eyes—something almost like pain.

"I can't," he murmured.

It felt like the ground beneath me shifted.

My hands curled into fists at my sides. "Why?"

Felix looked away again, his expression carefully guarded. "Because some things might change and I don't want that."

Something cold settled in my stomach.

What the hell did that mean?

What could he possibly be hiding that would change something?

I took a step back, my mind spinning. "So that's it?" I asked, my voice almost bitter. "You're just going to shut me out and expect me to be okay with it?"

Felix exhaled, pressing his fingers against his temples. "Hyunjin, please—"

"No." I shook my head, my frustration bubbling over. "I don't get it. We went through so much together, and now you're acting like I'm a stranger—like you can't even trust me."

Felix flinched slightly, and for a brief moment, I thought he was going to say something—something real. But instead, he just sighed again, like he was carrying a weight too heavy to put into words.

"I need time," he said quietly.

Time.

It sounded like an excuse.

But I didn't push anymore. I couldn't.

Because the truth was, I was scared.

Scared of what he wasn't telling me.

Scared of what it would mean when he finally did.

I turned away first this time, running a hand down my face. My body felt exhausted, but my mind wouldn't stop racing.

"I'm going to bed," I muttered, my voice hollow.

Felix didn't stop me.

And for the first time in a long time, I realized I didn't want to go to bed with him.

Because the space between us felt too wide.

And I wasn't sure how to close it.

so I went to the guest room.

A/N 

sorry y'all!!! but damnn Lix be a bit kind with ur husband.