The One I'm Not (Twenty One Pilots)

To Win

*Please read with chapter with care. Stay alive |-/*

Josh hadn't slept in days. Every since they came back from Kentucky, he didn't know what came over him. It was like he was hit with a huge sad attack and he just felt emotionally drained. Empty of feeling as he felt numb. The days were simple and long. He'd stayed in his room until Tyler came back from class or Mark came back from work and then come out of room to show that he was fine. They believed it luckily. Josh was always good at hiding how he truly felt. Today was just the worst of it. He laid in bed, not sleeping, just thinking. His mind was racing. Mark had the day off today and had checked on Josh multiple times but Josh always pretended to be asleep. When Tyler came back from class, he heard a conversation through his door.

"So we have to have the CD release show on school campus." Tyler said.

"Really? Okay, how do we manage that? I assume there's a stage on campus somewhere." Mark said.

"There's one on the west side, an outdoor one. We have to see if we can rent it, I think."

"Okay, should we go do that now?"

"Yeah, better early than late. Should we get Josh?"

"Hmm, maybe let him sleep. I checked on him right before you came in and he was still sleeping, he's not dead though he changed positions from last time I checked on him. I don't know why he's sleeping still... he's been like this ever since we got back from Kentucky last week."

"Really? Okay, we'll check on him when we get back then. I hope he's okay..."

He waited until he heard the front door shut before opening his room door.

They have noticed I've been different.

They don't care.

When have they ever?

Remember when Mark told you about the other drummer, Chris?

He's so much better than you.

Tyler doesn't need you anymore.

Mark doesn't need you.

Debby doesn't need you.

No. One. Needs. You.

You're just a WASTE OF AIR.

A WASTE OF SPACE.

DON'T YOU WANT THE PAIN TO END?

IT'S BETTER THAT WAY.

Josh fell to his knees and placed his hands against his temples. His head was hurting with the terrible thoughts.

"No, they-"

IT'S AN ACT, JOSH.

HAVE I BEEN WRONG BEFORE?

DON'T YOU WANT TO GET RID OF ME?

Josh popped his head up. He did want to get rid of the voice.

ADMIT YOU'RE WEAK!

KILL ME OFF!

"I am a waste."

OF AIR.

OF SPACE.

"I don't do anything."

SITTING IN YOUR HOME ALL DAY.

YOU'RE NOTHING!

"I'm worthless."